Stubbornness
by kylermalloy
Summary: "There was no denying that Melanie had died a long time ago. Her sacrifice had broken Jamie's and my heart. So how was I supposed to feel now that her body snatcher has found its way back to us?" Jared's point of view of The Host. Why on earth is he so stubborn?
1. Chapter 1

**Hi!**

**So as stated in the summary, this is Jared's point of view of the novel. Surprisingly, so far, Jared's headspace has been incredibly easy to get into. I still don't really like my own writing, but for some reason I'm excited about this story. Tell me what you think!**

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_I walk toward the house, placing my heels down first, then rolling my weight forward silently. There are no lights. Just in case, I grip the handle of my father's hunting knife as I creep up to the quaint little house. Sweat drips down my back, and I long for a breeze to awaken the still night and cool me down._

_Quiet as an Indian—as I fancied myself as a boy—I mount the steps to the patio door. They've left the glass arcadia door slid open. How careless. It's ironic how they aren't scared of each other like we were, but they are the scariest things _we_ can imagine._

_Standing in the open doorway, I scan the darkened house for any—any sign of…_

_Movement._

_Someone is moving across the floor toward me._

_For a split second, I stand frozen on the patio, my shadow stretching out on the tiles toward the girl—for it is a girl, a teenager, an innocent-looking thing who would be my downfall. The parasite that looks like a young woman sees me and squeaks in terror, whirling away from me, like she's been caught too._

_Ha. No, it is I who will be caught if I don't _deal_ with this monster._

_I whip the knife out, run forward, and grab this fragile creature who will be the death of me. "One sound and you die."_

_It surprises me by speaking, not breathlessly with fear, but in a low, angry hiss. "Do it. Just do it. I don't want to be a filthy parasite!"_

_"Clever," I whisper. It's pretending to be human, trapped by a parasite. By me. _I'm_ the parasite. "Must be a Seeker. And that means a trap. How did they know?" I wrap my hand around its throat. Its body is so small. Choking it seems _wrong._ But I know what I'm doing is right. Justice._

_"Where are the rest of them?" I want to kill it. So much. More, nonsensically, than I wanted to kill the centipedes who caused the death of my family and left me alone. But I can't kill it yet. I have to figure out its trick._

_"It's just me," it gasps, its voice raspy. I'm hurting it._

_Good._

_Suddenly, it rams its elbow into my stomach, trying to get free. I'm not letting it go. It's lying to me. There's no way only one of them would come after me._

_It kicks me. I'm thrown off balance for a second, and it tries to run. I tighten my grip again, holding it to me. "Feisty for a peace-loving body snatcher, aren't you?" When it comes to life and death, I suppose, the parasites are just as self-preserving as we were._

_It claws at me some more, its long nails scratching my hand. I squeeze its neck harder. "I _will_ kill you, you worthless body thief. I'm not bluffing." My fingers overlap around its little neck, the tips meeting in the back, right where the disgusting little scar is. I will leave it a new scar, in front._

_"Do it, then!"_

_Why does it tell me to kill it? This trick doesn't make any sense. My fingers are right where the scar would be, and yet I don't feel anything…_

_I gasp. My fingers release its throat, both hands now feeling for the scar that should be there, that would be there, if, if…_

_"Impossible," I whisper. Suddenly her actions and words make sense. I reach in my pocket for a light. With my other hand, I spin her around and shine the flashlight in her eyes. Left, then right._

_There's no reflection._

_"I can't believe it." Something I haven't felt in a long time is growing in me. Hope. I'm not the only one. "You're still human."_

_I feel a rush of affection for this girl, this human girl in front of me. Without thinking, I pull her face closer to mine and I kiss her on the mouth._

_Her lips are so soft._

_I never saw her face clearly in the dim flickers of my flashlight. I don't care. She is human. That is enough to make her beautiful._

_She moves her leg suddenly, and then I feel astonishing pain in one of the few sensitive parts of me. I gasp, unable to breathe. As I react to the pain, she dodges out of my arms, past me and out the open patio door._

_Just when I want her to stay, she runs. Now I'm the threat._

_"Wait," I choke, still winded. I can't even walk yet._

_She pelts outside, and I hear little _thumps_ as something falls out of her pockets. Some kind of provision, probably. Everything she did makes sense now. She came into this dark house, raiding the fridge, keeping completely quiet. When I found her, she thought _I_ was coming after _her_. She's in the same boat I am. I can't let her leave._

_Somehow I regain my balance, and I'm staggering after her. She is so fast. If not for the bulky bag in her hand, I'm sure she would be far away and invisible by now._

_I yell after her, not caring now about attracting attention. "I'm not one of them!" I'm not, and neither is she. Some reckless part of me doesn't care if I _am_ caught now. At least I'm not alone. "Listen to me! Look, I'll prove it! Just stop and look at me!"_

_She's off the gravel driveway now, running away into the desert. Desperation fuels me. I sprint. "I didn't think there was anyone left! Please, I need to talk to you!"_

_It dawns on me, then, that she might not be running because she thinks I'm a parasite. Perhaps I scared her off with my wild, animal reaction. "I'm sorry I kissed you! That was stupid! I've just been alone so long!"_

_Finally, I'm close enough to hear her speak. "Shut _up!_"_

_I won't. I can't abandon another of my kind._

_I leap for her, make a flying tackle like I used to in football. She falls under me more easily than the opponents I remember. "Wait—a—minute," I pant, in between raspy, painful breaths. I haven't run that fast in a long time._

_She squirms under me, no doubt uncomfortable. Her breath comes out in a growl. Still fighting. A minute ago, when I thought she was an alien, her feistiness infuriated me. Now it makes me like her even more._

_"Look, look, look!" I have to reassure her. My neck won't exactly help, but my eyes will. I turn on the flashlight again and shine it in my own eyes. "See? See? I'm just like you!" Will she stay now? She has to stay._

_"Let me see your neck."_

_She still isn't convinced. I don't blame her; no doubt I'd do the same thing if I were her. But I can't help her there. "Well…that won't exactly help anything. Aren't the eyes enough? You know I'm not one of them." Please believe me. Please understand I don't mean you any harm._

_"Why won't you show me your neck?"_

_I might as well tell her. Better she hear it from me, now, straight. "Because I have a scar there."_

_As she tries to escape me again, I hold her down. I'm not being cruel. I just don't ever want to be alone. "It's self-inflicted. I think I did a pretty good job, even though it _hurt._" I remember the pain. But I think losing perhaps the only other human alive would hurt worse. "I don't have all that pretty hair to cover my neck. The scar helps me blend in." Everything I say is true, yet it's overcompensation. I'm almost babbling now. I'm desperate for her to believe me._

_She twists under me again. "Get off me."_

_I do. Once I'm up and she stays lying on the ground, I offer my hand to her. She's probably more fragile than she acts. "Please don't run away. And…erm, I'd rather you didn't kick me again either."_

_She stares at me. I must seem so strange to her, like a wild man. A freak. She speaks again, her voice now softer. More unsure. "Who are you?"_

_"My name is Jared Howe." I grin as I say my name for the first time since I've been alone. I've almost forgotten it. "I haven't spoken to another human being in more than two years, so I'm sure I must seem…a little crazy to you." Crazy, desperate. Starved for love._

_It's not that. That's not why I kissed her. Although she seems like a nice girl. Of course, she is human, and that's enough, but I can see her now. She's pretty. She's obviously a survivor._

_I've kissed her, I've almost killed her, I've chased her down and tackled her, but I don't know who she is. "Please forgive that and tell me your name anyway."_

_She continues to stare at me. In wonder? Fear? Never mind. She answers. "Melanie."_

_"Melanie." I roll the name in my mouth. Savor it. "I can't tell you how delighted I am to meet you." I bend down toward her, my hand still extended._

_Very slowly she reaches up and grasps my hand. I pull her effortlessly to her feet and don't let go of her once she's standing. I don't think I can._

_"What now?" she asks, still cautious. Edgy._

_"Well, we can't stay here long. Will you come back with me to the house? I left my bag. You beat me to the fridge."_

_She shakes her head, and I realize how much I've scared her. She can hardly move. "Will you wait for me here, then? I'll be very quick. Let me get us some more food." Judging by the size of her bag, she took about a week's worth of food, but I know I can carry far more._

_"Us?" She seems confused by this._

_I smile again. I can't stop smiling. This girl has given me more happiness in five minutes than I've had in the two years since I lost my family. "Do you really think I'm going to let you disappear? I'll follow you even if you tell me not to."_

_She hesitates still. "I…I don't have time. I have so far to go and…Jamie is waiting."_

_Jamie?_

_"You're not alone." I had assumed she was. If she already has someone with her, looking out for her, then she doesn't need me. Never mind that I need her. I'm not…jealous exactly, but I do feel a sense of disappointment._

_"My brother. He's just nine, and he's so frightened when I'm away."_

_Oh. Her brother. Her kid brother. Not someone who looks out for her, but someone whom _she_ looks after. I can't imagine looking after a nine-year-old in this world, someone who can barely sit still for an hour, someone who doesn't know how to be quiet or careful. I can barely take care of myself._

_Her motherly concern for this boy is very apparent in her voice. "It will take me half the night to get back to him. He won't know if I've been caught. He's so hungry." Right on cue, I hear her stomach gurgle faintly. I realize how hungry she must be, how long she and the boy, Jamie, have gone without food._

_"Will it help if I give you a ride?"_

_"A ride?" she inquires._

_Now I know what to do. How to keep her with me. "I'll make you a deal. You wait here while I gather more food, and I'll take you anywhere you want to go in my jeep. It's faster than running. Even faster than _you_ running." I still haven't entirely caught my breath from chasing her._

_"You have a car?"_

_"Of course. Do you think I _walked_ out here?" Her forehead wrinkles as she mulls it over._

_I'll take that as a yes._

_"We'll be back to your brother in no time. Don't move from this spot, okay?" I couldn't stand being alone anymore. If she left…I don't know what I'd do._

_She nods. My heart soars. She wants to stay. She—Melanie—wants to stay with me. I can feel the smile growing on my face again. "And eat something, please. I don't want your stomach to give us away."_

_Before I leave her, I want to do something. Again. Not in a moment of thoughtless passion, but in one of reassurance. "Please don't kick me."_

_I bend my head toward her, holding her face softly. As our lips touch again, she reacts very differently. Her breathing hitches in her throat, and her hands reach up to touch my face._

_I've never felt this before._

_Her hands wander to my neck, clasp together in the back. I don't have time to remember why she shouldn't before she screams. I know what she felt: a rigid line of healed tissue on the base of my neck. An imitation of what I would have if I was a parasite._

_But it's scared her. Melanie. This last human girl. My own miracle._

_"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" I unwind her arms from around my neck, pull her close to me. "I'm sorry."_

_As enamored as I am with this fellow human survivor, I realize how young she is. Delicate and anxious and petrified. I have to be careful._

_As I hold her, as her breathing slows to normal and she allows me to return to the house, I promise myself that I will never let Melanie go. She is my miracle, my living hope._

My love.

I was startled awake. Jamie was shaking me, whispering my name. "Your turn for watch."

I rose from my slumped position against the tree. I ruffled Jamie's shaggy hair absentmindedly, switching places with him.

My dream—my memory—always started out as my worst nightmare: I'd been caught, spotted by a body snatcher, and I would have to commit murder to save myself. Then my nightmare turned into bliss: I'd found hope again. Melanie. Jamie.

Now I was awake, and my worst nightmare had taken a different shape.

Melanie was gone.

She had been caught. Turned into one of them. A parasite.

She'd gone into enemy territory, trying to do something noble. Trying to find more of us. I waited for her, helpless, outside the city. I waited a whole week. Seven days, and she didn't come back.

I promised myself I'd never lose her. Never let her go.

But I did.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello again!**

**This is chapter two, straight from my own imagination. I had written half of what will now be chapter three before I realized there was a significant gap between Melanie's disappearance and Jared and Jamie getting to the caves. So here's a little glimpse of that!**

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I had to finish what Melanie started.

I couldn't let her last efforts be a waste, so I was going into the city myself. With Jamie. To find Sharon.

It was past midnight. We were bundled up in nondescript coats, all our possessions on our backs. The Jeep was hidden beyond the park. Our hoods were up, covering our necks and obscuring our eyes.

I took the kid into enemy territory.

Melanie had told me the address; the old apartment building was now condemned. We made extra sure no parasite saw us slip inside.

First we went upstairs. To the fifth floor. Where Melanie would have left a note for us if she didn't return. Inside the fifth door in the fifth hallway, I found a scrap of newsprint. A broken pencil lay beside it.

_Not fast enough Love you love Jamie don't go home._

I sank to my knees, holding her last message. Footsteps surrounded this paper, even covered it. I supposed the Seekers hadn't thought it important.

But it was everything to me. Everything in exactly the wrong way.

It was the final proof, confirmation of the terrible truth that Melanie had been captured.

Jamie made a choked sound in his throat. Still on my knees, I leaned over to hug him around the waist, muttering meaningless comfort: "It's okay. It's okay."

It was not okay.

But we hadn't accomplished our mission yet. So we went back downstairs and descended another level into the basement. I found the secret catch under the door hinge Melanie had described to me, and a tile in the floor slid away to reveal a room below the basement. I dropped down first, then helped guide Jamie after me.

A spotlight snapped on, illuminating our pale faces, our reflection-less eyes. I held Jamie defensively against me as two figures, only shadows behind the huge, rigged-up floodlight, stepped toward us.

"I told you. I _told_ you they were looking here again." The voice was low and rough, but it definitely belonged to a female. An older female, probably.

I fumbled in my pocket for the flashlight that I always kept there, and aimed it beyond the spotlight. Two faces, shadowy and obscure, recoiled from the light, but I'd seen their eyes. They were human.

"Take care of them. They're Seekers." That voice certainly belonged to a woman, a younger one. Two women. Could they have been Melanie's quarry?

"No, no, don't you see?" I exclaimed quickly. "I'm human too." I lowered my hood, looking straight into the light.

There was a rustling, and the spotlight's powerful beam dimmed some. I blinked the spots away from my eyes, exhaling in relief that they had believed me.

Then one of the figures stepped forward. She was holding something long and thin out toward me. It gleamed faintly in the pool of light.

A sword!

I jumped back, flattening myself against the wall. Jamie clung to me, speechless with fear.

"Who are you?" the woman barked. "Why did you come here?"

"L—looking for you!" I huffed, a little breathless myself. My voice came out a little higher than usual. I hadn't been this scared since…since…since my family had died, probably. I was helpless, being threatened point-blank with a deadly weapon. And I had a kid relying on me. "Listen, Melanie Stryder—you know who she is, right?

Saying her name sent a wave of pain through my chest

"I know—I _knew_ her. She told me about you. You're her cousin; you're Sharon, aren't you?" I addressed the younger speaker, the one further back. "And you're Melanie's aunt. Maggie."

"It's a trap," Sharon hissed. I knew it was really them; they'd both flinched when I'd said their names. "It's got to be a trap."

I understood how they felt. I knew how hard it was to trust anyone's good intentions. Everyone was an enemy, a traitor.

"No, really!" I reached behind me, fumbling into my backpack. "Look—" I pulled out Mel's photo album. "Jeb left us lines. Yes, Jeb! Your brother! He left us clues to a safe place."

Maggie didn't budge. The sword stayed pointed at my chest.

"Aunt Maggie!" Jamie pushed his way forward. "Please believe him. Melanie came to look for you. She—" He faltered. "She got caught."

"Jamie," Maggie breathed. "Little Jamie."

"Yes, it's me! She was trying to help you."

"She knew about this place, and she got caught?" Sharon said in a hard voice behind Maggie. "We need to get out of here."

"That's true," Maggie answered her. "But first we have to take care of...whatever your name is." She malevolently directed these words at me.

"I'm Jared," I said impatiently. "Look, we can go look for Jeb together, but we have to figure out these lines."

"Lines?" Maggie said, her hostile voice now containing a tiny note of curious interest. "Let me see them."

"Put the sword down and I will," I countered. This treatment, this onslaught of hostility and enmity from fellow humans was entirely unexpected. Why were they so unfriendly?

Maggie slowly lowered her weapon, still glaring at me vengefully. I had a _sneaking_ suspicion that we weren't going to be the best of friends. "Give that here."

As I held the album out to her, something fell from its pages. I picked the picture up and examined it briefly as Maggie grabbed the book from me. _Stryder Ranch, 1904..._

Maggie and Sharon discussed the strange lines in low voices, not bothering to include us.

Jamie shot me a look, one that clearly said: _Why did we come to find them again?_

I shrugged ruefully. They were a consolation prize, I supposed, more humans in exchange for the loss of Melanie.

I didn't feel particularly gratified.

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**So that part was fun. Short, I know. But still pretty fun! As I said before, I've already written part of the next chapter, so it should be up in no time! Tune back in soon!**

**By the way, thanks for taking the time to read my story! Well, technically speaking, it isn't even ****_my_**** story. Forget the universe and characters, I can't even make up my own ****_plot! _****Oh, well. Better not get too down on myself.**

**Thank you for reading KylerM.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Whoops. That took longer than expected. I never got around to uploading this chapter... Oh, well, it's here now, and I'm actually pretty pleased with it. Let me know what you think!**

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"Wake up, Jared."

I blinked sleepily. That was Jamie's voice. I'd only just dozed off; what did he want?

"What, kid?"

"Get up. Please?"

He sounded alert. He probably hadn't gone to sleep at all. He sounded...apprehensive.

Why did he sound that way? He had no reason to be scared anymore. We were safe.

We lived with Jeb now. With him and the other thirty-two humans here, including Sharon and Maggie. There was plenty of food, and we could sleep the whole night without keeping vigil for body snatchers. In this fearful new world, it was the best we could ask for.

Except...it was just Jamie and me.

While we didn't have much cause to be _happy_, we at least were able to feel safe. So what was bothering Jamie now?

"Come _on_, Jared. Someone's outside."

Fear clenched my stomach. _Someone's outside._ We never ventured outside our sanctuary of caves unless we had business with the parasites. If someone was outside now, it wasn't one of us. If it wasn't one of us...it had to be one of them.

I sprang off the mattress, meeting Jamie's fearful eyes, exchanging an uneasy look with Wes, standing at our door, who must've brought the news.

Wes, nearly ten years younger than me, elaborated, his voice conveying trepidation, but also a bit of reckless excitement. "Jeb saw something moving in the desert yesterday. Thought it was just an animal. But this afternoon he saw it again, closer. Now he thinks it's someone following the lines."

Someone was following lines like we had to get here. I knew Jeb had left similar instructions with others. If anyone with directions here was caught...that could be dangerous.

Wes added, "It's a woman, a young woman."

My stomach dropped. No. Surely not. _Don't let her have followed. Don't let this thing torture me any more._ I couldn't handle it.

Jamie looked up at me, his brown eyes hopeful. "Do you think it's—"

"No," I cut him off before he could say it. "She didn't know."

"I just wanted to tell you because...Jeb went out to see about it," Wes said. "We're getting ready to roll if we have to."

My mouth was dry. This couldn't be happening. If the person outside was...

She would be a parasite, and she would be dangerous. And she would hurt me.

But surely it wasn't her. It couldn't be. And if it was, I wasn't going to be the one to deal with it. I asked Wes, "What do I need to do?"

"If you wanna help Doc, he's got some stuff to pack up. We haven't got much else in terms of supplies."

"Jamie," I instructed. "C'mon." If there was a crisis, I wanted to keep him close.

We didn't get any sleep that night. Packing everything we needed for a new hiding place only took a few hours, but no one wanted to rest when Jeb had gone out, defenseless, to meet a possible threat.

Most everyone congregated in the dining hall. Lucina passed out rolls. I chewed on mine distractedly while Jamie leaned his head on my shoulder. As he drifted off, he got heavier and heavier. Beside him, Lucina's boys were slumped over the table, Isaiah snoring quietly, Freedom sucking his thumb.

Just before dawn, Jeb came back, unscathed. Human. Safe.

Everyone swarmed around him, pelting him with questions. Who was it? _What_ was it? Had it died? Was it alone? Were we in danger?

"Calm down, people. Everything's _fine._ There's no danger." He searched the crowd, finally finding me. I'd hung back from the onslaught; I didn't _want_ to know. His eyes were tight...anxious.

"What'd you do with it?" Heath demanded.

"I have to go back out," Jeb said, looking away from me. "Any volunteers want to come with me?"

I remained silent. I did _not_ want to go. I was afraid of what I'd find.

A group of eight formed to accompany Jeb. Not surprisingly, most of them were the same ones who volunteered for raids. I received a few odd looks from them when I stayed in my seat.

Trudy and Geoffrey were going together; they were _always_ together. Brandt and Aaron, Andy, Maggie for some reason, and both the O'Sheas, Kyle and Ian.

Ian was always so level-headed. I admired the calm, cool contrast he presented for his hot-headed brother. He was the negotiator, the deducer, and he wasn't a bad fighter either.

Kyle. He'd lost his partner too. Maybe that was why he was so angry. He was angry all the time. He acted like I felt. I supposed I was just better at hiding it.

Brandt and Aaron had known each other for a long time; they seemed like another pair of brothers. On the outside, they'd worked together to stay hidden, saving each other's lives in turn.

Andy was younger than me. He would still be in college, he'd told me, had the invasion not forced him to flee. His wholehearted devotion to his partner, Paige, rather depressed me, for obvious reasons, but he was a good guy. Funny. He would feign a swaggering, cocky nature that would lower to reveal an extremely humble but determined young man.

And Maggie was...Maggie. Suspicious. Irritable. Caustic.

As they left, I carried Jamie back to our room. He needed a few more hours of rest. I tried to sleep as well, but...I had other things on my mind.

When Jamie woke up, he was his normal self. He'd dismissed any notion of...our knowing the trespasser when I'd denied it to him. He wasn't worried, even when I told him Jeb had gone back out. He just shrugged and asked when breakfast was. After he ate, he sped on to Sharon's class without a care in the world.

I had to work. Today it was my turn to water the cornfield, though the job wasn't nearly taxing enough to keep my mind off the guys outside. However, I only had to endure half a day of preoccupation, because after lunch _everyone_ stopped working.

Jeb was back. The procession he'd taken with him at first light filed into the main plaza ahead of him. Kyle was first, followed closely by Brandt and Aaron. They were whispering furtively to one another, all wearing angry expressions.

I didn't rush forward to ask them what they'd found in the desert, or what they'd done with it. It was better I didn't know.

Maggie came inside next, her hand clenched around the crowbar so tightly her knuckles were white. "Get out of here," she hissed at me. I returned her furious glare. Our journey here together hadn't warmed me to her any more, and I supposed the feeling was mutual.

But why did she want me to leave?

Andy, Trudy, Geoffrey. They avoided my eyes as they entered the plaza and melted into the crowd. Ian walked in last. He found me in the sea of curious faces, shooting me a sympathetic look.

Someone across the plaza suddenly exclaimed, "He did _what?!_"

"That's right." That was Kyle, sounding even angrier than usual. Apparently Jeb had done something _again_ to infuriate everyone. A disgruntled babble spread through the crowd, as the news passed from mouth to ear. I was about to demand some answers, some explanations from them, when Jeb walked into the cave. Behind him…

Behind him was someone I never thought I'd see again.

Melanie.

My feet carried me forward, toward the woman I loved so fiercely, before I could think, process what her reappearance meant. As soon as I could do that, I jerked myself to a halt, my hands now curling into fists.

As Melanie stepped into the cavern, she lifted her face to the ceiling, taking in the scale of the place. Her eyes…her eyes sent beams of silver shooting onto the walls.

That wasn't Melanie.

She was dead; she'd been dead for half a year now, but her body was coming back to mock me. Mock my failure. Mock Jamie's grief. _My_ grief.

Now that the murderer was here, standing in front of me, my hatred for it grew. Grew so powerful that it choked me. In that moment, I hated that body. I wanted it gone. Even more than when I'd wanted to kill it the night we met. Because now I knew the person who had been inside. And _she_ was gone.

Then it saw me.

Its eyes, shining in the light, met mine and widened in shock. I supposed it hadn't expected to see me here.

"Jared!"

It was coming toward me, staggering with exhaustion, but running eagerly for me.

Disgust rose like bile in my throat. It had the gall to come here and act like Melanie. Like it was deserving of the love I had for her. Like it _was_ her.

Before it could reach me, touch me, I lashed out, backhanding it, hard. I never would have done that to Melanie. Ever. But I knew she was gone. That thing, that monster, deserved to be hit. I hated it.

It fell violently to the floor, hitting the stone hard and sprawling out at my feet. I stepped toward it. I could feel my hate and anger twisting my face into a snarl. It watched me get closer, seeming enraptured by my face. It was very unnerving. I wanted it to stop; _I_ wanted to stop it, to keep it from looking at me with those familiar expressions.

Jeb stepped in front of me. He didn't look excited or angry or worried. He met my eyes, staring me down coolly. Sending a message. _Leave it alone._

I gave up the confrontation; arguing with Jeb was pointless. Besides, I wasn't sure what I would have done to it. Yes, it had killed Melanie, but could I really kill her body? Silence it? Forcibly take the life from it once and for all?

No. I didn't think I could.

I dropped my face to the ground, unwilling to meet the stares of all the humans in the cavern. They were muttering again; they'd probably wanted me to kill it right then and there. Jeb helped the parasite to its feet courteously, kindly—acting like it was human. I gritted my teeth, struggling against my anger. Why had he brought it here at all? He knew how it would hurt me. What if Jamie saw it?

Then Doc appeared. "Okay, okay, I'm here. What have we got?"

No.

Jeb had brought Melanie's body for Doc. To mutilate her neck, trying to dig the centipede out while the centipede fought back in the only way it knew how. I'd buried the bodies of Doc's victims often enough. It was gruesome. I couldn't let them do this. Not to Melanie.

Maggie was speaking. Explaining how Melanie's body got here. I heard her say, carelessly, "Used to be our niece Melanie."

Why did she have to be so callous about it? Sharon, too. Sharon, even though she had found hope and love in these caves—the two things I'd never have again—was still just as hard as her mother.

Doc reached for Melanie's body with a morbidly curious expression. The thing inside Melanie shrank back, like it knew what Doc was going to do. He tried to reassure her: "It's okay. I won't hurt you."

As if.

He examined her, turning her head to see the…the pink line on her neck.

What I pretended to have, what _Melanie_ had not had, this mark of the parasites, was on this _thing._ In that instant, I hated the parasite all over again. Doc, too, for exposing the scar.

Doc was voicing his evaluation of her health. Something about dehydration. I only clearly heard his last three words: "Let's get started."

The centipede didn't move. Perhaps it was as shocked as I was. How could Jeb do this to me?

Doc motioned Kyle and Ian forward to carry it, since it obviously wouldn't go on its own, but I finally found my voice. "No."

Everyone looked at me again, accusingly. Doc blinked once, confused. "Jared? Is there a problem?"

_"Yes."_ Couldn't they see how this made me feel? Because this was Melanie's body, I hated the parasite inside it, but couldn't see any part of her get hurt. I was…_afraid_ for the alien. And I hated that.

"And it is?"

"I'll _tell_ you the problem, Doc. What's the difference between letting you have it or Jeb putting a bullet through its head?" Not that I wanted either to happen. But if I got a choice…

I continued speaking, cutting off Doc's bemused reply. "The difference is, if Jeb kills it, at least it dies cleanly."

Now Doc had gained some of his wits back. "Jared, we learn so much each time. Maybe this will be the time…" While he was trying to placate me, his tone was also uncertain. I realized he was trying to convince himself as well as me.

I snorted. "I don't see much progress being made, Doc." These were hurtful words and I knew it. Doc beat himself up every time he ended a human life. But if he had no idea how to get the parasite out, what was the point of letting Melanie's body be experimented on that way?

Sharon obviously wasn't thinking the same thing. "There's no point in wasting an opportunity. We all realize this is hard for you, Jared—"

Did they? I wanted to challenge her, dare her to put herself in my shoes. Part of me, though, hypothesized that Sharon would make the same decision about a parasite if it was her cousin, her mother, or her own partner.

She was still talking, rationalizing. "…it's not your decision to make. We have to consider what's best for the majority."

I glared at her, almost as angry with her now as I was with the parasite in Mel's body. Why couldn't she understand? _"No,"_ I repeated, my tone hopefully sounding emphatic and final.

Sharon jabbed her finger at my chest. "Stop being so _selfish._ Think about what Melanie would want. Would she want you to keep her body around?"

"She wouldn't want her body _hacked up,_" I spat. In the corner of my eye, I spotted movement. Kyle and Ian were stepping toward me again, this time looking ready for a fight. I shifted so I was between Melanie's body and the two big men. "Don't touch her!" I shouted.

More movement, this time from behind me. I turned just in time to see the worm in Melanie's body fall over. It must have fainted from exhaustion, pain, fear, something. Its eyes were still open, though. They moved rapidly, searching for something.

"Jamie," it breathed. "Jamie."

It sickened me, the way it said the kid's name. Like it knew him. Like it _cared_ about him. Jeb answered, his voice husky. "The kid is fine. Jared brought him here."

Why did he do that? Why did he tell it about Jamie? Why did it deserve to know?

It looked at me again, only half-conscious, its eyes barely focusing. "Thank you," it whispered before blacking out.

I turned back to look at Sharon, Ian, and Kyle, sending them a silent message, the way Jeb had to me earlier. Thankfully, I heard Jeb slap his rifle behind me and knew he was on my side.

Sharon made a disgusted noise and stalked away. Doc followed after her, looking back at me confusedly. After a second, Kyle walked away too, shadowed by his brother.

"Everybody get on outta here now," Jeb ordered, not harshly, but with executive power. The people left in the main plaza slowly trudged out, glancing back at us with murderous stares.

I stared down at Melanie's body, at its dirty clothes, its face covered in sweat and dust. A bruise was beginning to form on her cheek. Was it the side I'd hit? I couldn't afford to think about that. If I did, I would begin to feel bad about it.

When the plaza was cleared, Jeb stepped closer to me. "Better hide her somewhere outta the way."

_Her?_

I began to protest, but he held up his hand again—the one with the gun. "You made this mess, now you have take care of it."

I groaned quietly, looking down at Melanie's body again. It was hard to be disgusted by it, now that its eyes were closed…

No. That wasn't Melanie. It was the enemy. But at the same time, I couldn't bring myself to hurt her. I didn't want anyone else to hurt her, either. How paradoxical.

I _had_ brought this on myself. I sighed. "Where?"

Jeb thought for a minute. "How about the storage hall?"

My forehead wrinkled. "Are you sure that's…safe?" The storage hall was not a hundred yards from the caves' entrance. If there was one thing I was sure of concerning this parasite, I knew it could not be allowed to find the way out. It would destroy us.

"Sometimes the best hiding place is in plain sight."

I considered this, weighing my options. The ceiling in that part of the caves was solid, no cracks or holes. Aside from the tunnel that led outside, there was just the one corridor. I could catch it if it tried to run away.

And it was one place in the caves no one visited regularly, especially now that there were almost no supplies. No one would come looking down there unless they were looking for _it._ And I could handle them if they came.

I nodded, and Jeb grunted assent. "Good. I'll bring some food down later. Don't worry, I'll be subtle about it."

"Where are you going now?" I asked him, bending down over the parasite. I was finding _touching_ it…difficult.

"To the game room. Everyone needs to know the deal with her."

"Which is?" I demanded. The last time I'd looked, no one had any idea what to do with Melanie's body.

Jeb winked. "I'll figure something out. Something that'll make 'em leave you alone."

And he left me to carry my dead—but not dead—lover to a prison cell.

* * *

**Okay, there it is. Actually, when I wrote this, Jared actually kind of scared me. He's just so intensely hateful! I don't even know if I did him justice.**

**Hopefully the next chapter will be up in a few weeks, but no promises!**

**Thank you for reading KylerM.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello!**

**I like how the chapters keep getting longer.**

**Chapter four, obviously. Let me know what you think!**

* * *

I carried Melanie's body down the hallways to the storage corridor, treading carefully on the uneven floor. As I cradled her in my arms, I couldn't help studying her. Her hair was much shorter; Melanie liked her hair long. Her nails were stubby—Melanie had hated biting her nails. The muscles that had been well-toned from constantly running and working had softened some. She'd been living quite a different life.

Her presence brought back so many memories…memories of bliss and happiness, now turned bitter and painful. Because she _wasn't_ Melanie.

Thankfully, I met no one on my way. Jeb must have summoned everyone to the dark sulfurous game room.

Once I reached the supply corridor, I eased Mel's body into the roundish hole usually used for storing boxes and bags of food. It fit, although I didn't think it would be very comfortable. But it was most important that it stay confined and out of sight.

I sat next to it, in almost complete darkness. I kept my face turned away, not wanting to even try to look at it. It had killed Melanie. It was the reason Jamie and I had suffered, been so unhappy, ever since we arrived here. The news that over thirty human beings were still alive hadn't fazed me at all because the one human I wanted was gone. Now she was back, inhabited by a different awareness. One who wanted to kill me. Not only kill me, but torture me with my leftover emotions for this body. Run razor blades over the pain that was still fresh.

What was I _thinking?_

Why couldn't I allow myself to let Melanie go? It was like because her body was here, I was expecting her to wake up and be herself again. Rationally, I knew that wouldn't happen. But with her body so close, so alive, I couldn't bring myself to be the final end of it.

On the other hand, if we let it live, surely it would find its way out sooner or later. And that _could not_ happen. What good would it do to let it rot away in here, eating our food, stealing my time and attention? Jamie needed me more than this _thing._

Jeb interrupted my internal argument, bringing me food for two and a lantern. "Give this to her when she wakes up."

"_Her?"_ I hissed, infuriated at Jeb's casual use of the feminine—the _human_—pronoun.

"You know what I mean."

I looked back at Melanie's body. It was still sleeping uneasily, its stomach gurgling quietly. Like the night I found Melanie.

"Okay. Hey—don't let Jamie know."

The old man looked uneasy. "I can't promise you that, kid. Word travels pretty quickly in here. Stay alert," he told me as a parting.

Duh.

Not long after—long enough for me to eat, but not long enough for me to come to any conclusions—the parasite woke up. It shifted slightly, but didn't make any sound. Didn't open its eyes. Was it pretending to still be asleep? Preparing to make a run for it?

I decided to make the first move, let it know I was here. If it ran, I'd have no choice but to kill it. If it stayed put…I'd be able to maintain this uncomfortable situation a while longer. Great.

I slid the tray into the opening, letting it grate loudly along the floor. The parasite came to life very suddenly, reacting in fear. It propelled itself away from the opening, covering its face. A small shriek came from her lips—so like the one Melanie had made when I'd seen her for the first time.

I had to stop making these comparisons. This thing wasn't Melanie, nor did it deserve to be thought of as Melanie. My hate for the parasite returned as I watched it, and I felt _my_ face contort with anger.

It remained cowered against the back wall until it saw what I was giving it. Then it lunged forward, grabbing the bottle of water from the plastic tray. So eager. It acted just like a starved human being would have, gulping the water down with gusto, like it had never drunk before.

But it wasn't human. It didn't deserve this kindness.

Disgusted by its ardent hunger, I turned away while it drank and ate. When it was finished, I heard the scrape of the plastic against the ground as it pushed the tray back toward me.

I couldn't bring myself to look at it as I reached back in the hole. It wasn't sleeping anymore, or hiding its face in fear. If I looked into its eyes…would I feel sympathy for it? Would I see Mel instead of a monster?

"Thank you," it whispered to me. Trying to gain my trust? Win my mind over?

I didn't grace it with an answer.

It sat silently for a while; I couldn't see much else of it, turned half away from the hole. I tried to think very little about what I was doing; if I did, I might come to my senses and end this misery. It _was_ misery. Rationally, stopping this situation would stop the pain. I just wasn't sure if I wanted to.

I fell back on old memories of better times. I immersed myself in them. Living with my family as a child. My brothers. Helping my father build a safe haven from alien invaders that were then a joke between us.

Normally these memories were so excruciating I purposefully shunned them. However, the present was much more painful now.

I skimmed through memories of Melanie. Finding her. Meeting Jamie. Living with them. Loving her…

Gradually the parasite settled into a more horizontal position, trying to get comfortable enough to sleep. Its feet stuck out of the hole. I wanted to shove them back in, to keep any part of it from my sight, but I reminded myself I was trying to ignore it.

At least it seemed to accept that it wasn't going anywhere. Or maybe it was just biding its time.

Footsteps sounded in the corridor ahead. More than one pair. Purposeful. Angry. I knew at once it wasn't Jeb.

They were coming to find me. And Melanie.

I leapt to my feet. I didn't feel ready to defend this parasite from the death whoever was coming would bring. Somewhere inside, I wondered if they were doing the right thing.

There were three of them. Kyle, Ian, and Brandt.

The three best soccer players in the caves, also the best fighters. The most dependable on raids.

"Ah. Here you are," Kyle boomed. He sounded angrier than usual. Livid.

I clenched my fists.

"We're not going to allow this, Jared," Ian said. At least he was trying to reason with me. I wasn't going to give in, though. "We've all lost somebody—heck, we've all lost everybody. But this is ridiculous."

How was it ridiculous? I simply didn't want the body of the girl I loved to be mangled and tortured. Yes, it was complicated; yes, both decisions were painful. But Mel's body didn't deserve to be hacked up—or beaten to a pulp. Not by them.

"If you won't let Doc have it, then it's got to die," Kyle continued.

"You can't keep it prisoner here." That was Ian. The brothers were speaking in tandem, in complete agreement with each other—something that almost never happened. "Eventually it will escape and we'll all be exposed."

Then why did he think I was down here?! Why couldn't they leave me alone, give me time to sort things out? All I knew was I wasn't ready to let Mel go. Not completely.

I thought of her body in the hole. What was the parasite thinking? Surely it knew a fight was coming. Would it try to escape in the confusion? I stepped directly in front of the opening, blocking both parties from converging.

"Don't make this difficult, Jared," Brandt pressed. "It has to be done."

"We don't want to hurt you, Jared. We're all brothers here. But we will if you make us." Kyle._ "Move aside."_

They were trying to force my hand, to make me choose them over Melanie. Melanie's body. Make me realize how stupid the whole thing was. But as I stood between them and that hole, I realized that they had forced my hand in the opposite direction. However irrationally, however twisted the situation, I realized that I was choosing—had already chosen—to protect Melanie. I would always choose Melanie.

So I would fight them.

Normally, in a fight, I would analyze my opponents' weaknesses and use them to my advantage. But there were three of them, and they easily compensated for each others' disadvantages. Kyle would seize the offensive opportunity to attack me, and Ian would cover for him defensively. And Brandt could kill the parasite easily while I was distracted.

"Jared, please," Ian tried.

I didn't move. I knew it was a lost cause, but I wouldn't give Mel up. Not without a fight.

Like with the parasite earlier, I figured it was better to make the first move. I lunged forward, catching Kyle's stomach with my fist. He gasped and reeled back a step.

"No!" I froze at that familiar voice. There was a scuffling behind me as she—Melanie—_it_—climbed out of the hole. What was it doing? Didn't it realize they were here to kill it?

The three attackers halted in their tracks. They hadn't expected her to make an appearance voluntarily.

I didn't move my eyes from them. I knew, no matter how much she pleaded, they wouldn't show mercy. They didn't understand. I had to protect Melanie from them.

Suddenly I heard footsteps behind me, and then Melanie's body had forced itself in between Kyle and me. Her back was to me, her body pressing into me in a very familiar way. Protecting me, just like she always swore she would.

Kyle pushed her away, causing her to stumble backwards. Before she could fall, I grabbed her wrist, keeping her upright. If she ended up on the ground, they'd be on her in seconds…

The instant my skin touched hers, though, I was reawakened. This wasn't Melanie. It was a parasite, a puppet-master who controlled Melanie's thoughts and actions. Who had erased Melanie. Who was now trying to manipulate me with its body. Who had almost succeeded.

I shoved it away from me in disgust. "Get back in there!" I shouted at it. Just because I was protecting it for the time being didn't mean I had to be nice to it. Besides, if I raised my voice enough, perhaps Jeb would hear me. Perhaps he'd come and save us. Me.

The parasite didn't listen. It stepped back toward Kyle. Willingly walked toward the man with murder in his eyes. "I'm what you want. Leave him alone."

"Tricky bugger," Ian hissed, unsettled by its nerve.

It was playing games with me now. Dangerous games. Too dangerous simply to win my trust. Perhaps it didn't realize how serious they were, how deadly the situation was.

"I said get back in there."

It didn't look at me. "It's not your duty to protect me at your own expense." Instead, that was what _it_ was doing.

What was it thinking? It was like that first night with Melanie. I hadn't been able to make sense of that body snatcher's actions, and I'd quickly realized that her actions would make perfect sense if she'd been human. And she had been.

Now there was no denying it. Melanie wasn't there. The person standing in front of me was not human. And it was acting...strange. Obviously it was trying to beguile me, to soften me against its alien nature. I hated how it was using Mel. But I would still protect it. Because I was too shallow and selfish to let Melanie's body go.

I reached for it, trying to guide it back into the hole, away from the danger, but it dodged my hand. Ran toward the three murderers. Would it keep running?

Too late. Ian caught it, grabbed it by its arms. It struggled, and he held it more tightly. The picture of him forcibly restraining Melanie enraged me. "Get your hands off her!"

Ian pinned its arms behind its back, holding it while Kyle charged toward me. He and Brandt tried to restrain me, keep me from stopping them. I rammed my elbow into Kyle's stomach, the same spot where I'd punched him earlier. He sucked in a breath, loosening his grip for one second.

I was vaguely aware of Melanie's voice, so familiar and supplicating, begging with them. Of course they wouldn't listen.

I was fueled now, ready for a full-out fight. I twisted back around and met Kyle's face with my fist, hearing a satisfying _thwack._ When I pulled my hand back, there was moisture on my knuckles. Blood.

Hardly noticing this, Kyle growled and shoved me into Brandt. "Finish it, Ian!" he shouted.

Finish it.

"NO!" I cried desperately. He wouldn't. He couldn't do this to me.

I saw Ian seize Melanie's neck. Saw him lift her up. Heard her breath choke.

I disentangled myself from Brandt, only to be met with Kyle. I jabbed him in the side, but Brandt was there again, grabbing my right arm. They weren't going to let me get away. They were deliberately keeping me occupied. Because all the time I was fighting them, Ian kept squeezing the life out of Melanie.

She was going to die.

_Click, click._

The sound was unmistakable. Jeb had come, with his rifle. Just like I'd hoped. When he spoke, his voice was loud and authoritative. "Kyle, Ian, Brandt—back off!"

Kyle and Brandt had frozen, their arms outstretched, restraining me. Ian had frozen too—still strangling Melanie.

I had to save her. Unhindered by the others, I ducked out of our immobile standoff and lunged for Ian. My fist connected squarely with his jaw.

He yelped, releasing Melanie's body involuntarily, letting it fall to the floor, gasping for breath.

Fine. She was fine. She was alive.

I wanted to rush over, to pull her up, to make sure she was all right. I had to stop myself. To remind myself again that it wasn't _Melanie._

Jeb reprimanded the three would-be murderers sharply. "You're guests here, boys, and don't forget it. I told you not to go looking for the girl. She's my guest, too, for the moment, and I don't take kindly to any of my guests killing any of the others." Jeb seemed to be ignoring the fact that _she_ was not human.

"Jeb. Jeb, this is insane." Ian was nursing his jaw, which muffled his voice. I didn't think I'd drawn any blood on him, but I was glad my punch had hurt him. He'd tried to kill Mel. Not really Mel, but close enough.

Kyle, on the other hand, had blood streaming from his nose. Had I broken it? "What's your plan?" he inquired harshly. "We have a right to know. We have to decide whether this place is safe or if it's time to move on. So how long will you keep this thing as your pet? What will you do with it when you're finished playing God? All of us deserve to know the answers to these questions."

I turned to look at Jeb expectantly. Kyle was right, for once. We did need to know what was to be done with the parasite. And I trusted Jeb, if anyone, to make a reasonable decision.

But it seemed Jeb would disappoint me. "Don't have your answers, Kyle. It's not up to me."

What?

"Not up to you? Who then?" Kyle asked, his tone reflecting my shock. Was Jeb really foregoing this responsibility? This most important responsibility that I wanted resolved, over, done with?

"If you're thinking of putting it to a vote, that's already been done," Kyle continued. "Ian, Brandt, and I are the duly designated appointees of the result."

"It's not up for a vote. This is still my house."

"_Who then?"_ Kyle repeated, his voice getting louder again.

"It's Jared's decision."

"Jared?" Kyle echoed.

My mouth fell open as I stared at Jeb in disbelief. He wanted _me_ to take responsibility for it. He'd presented me with a complete catch-twenty-two. I knew I couldn't kill Melanie's body, even if it was possessed with a centipede. I could never make the conscious decision to end the life in that body. But if Jeb was leaving the fate of the parasite up to me, what would I do? If I couldn't make a decision about it, what was going to happen to it? Would I let it stay here indefinitely, as a prisoner? The agony of sitting next to the body of the girl I loved for just a few hours had been painful enough. This was going to destroy me.

I glared malevolently at the parasite whom I was now sure would ruin my life.

"That makes no sense!" Kyle protested. "He's more biased than anyone else! Why? How can he be rational about this?"

I couldn't. I already knew I couldn't. "Jeb, I don't…" I began, but Jeb cut me off. This time I didn't like the finality in his tone.

"She's your responsibility, Jared. I'll help you out, of course, if there's any more trouble like this, and with keeping track of her and all. But when it comes to making decisions, that's all yours."

I was numb. He couldn't be shoving this completely off on me. This was torture beyond any the aliens could have thought up on their own.

Kyle started to argue again, but Jeb shut him up with a wave of his hand. "Look at it this way, Kyle. If somebody found your Jodi on a raid and brought her back here, would you want me or Doc or a vote deciding what we did with her?"

Kyle's face took on a familiar expression—the one I'd seen in the mirror ever since Melanie was taken. "Jodi is dead," he snarled.

"Well, if her body wandered in here, it would still be up to you. Would you want it any other way? My house, my rules." Jeb used his trademark assertion, the one that was bound to win any argument. "No more discussion on this. No more votes." They'd apparently gone behind his back with the vote for the death penalty. "No more execution attempts. You three spread the word—this is how it works from now on. New rule."

"_Another_ one?" Ian whined.

Jeb didn't respond to that. "If, as unlikely as it may be, somehow this ever happens again, whoever the body belongs to makes the call." He motioned with the rifle. "Get out of here. I don't want to see you anywhere around this place again. You let everyone know that this corridor is off limits. No one's got any reason for being down here except Jared, and if I catch anyone skulking around, I'm asking questions second. You got that? Move. Now."

Jeb finished his lengthy dictum, sending Kyle, Brandt, and Ian away.

I couldn't feel any relief at their departure. I wasn't even sure if I was glad they'd failed. My feelings on Melanie's body were so messed up. I wanted it to go away, yet I didn't want it to die. I didn't want anything to do with it, but I didn't want anyone else near it.

I didn't want to look at the parasite now. Didn't want it to think I had any sympathy for it.

"Please don't put this on me, Jeb," I pleaded. "Kyle is right about one thing—I _can't_ make a rational decision."

To my dismay, Jeb was smiling. His severity was already gone, melted back into the affable, slightly eccentric old man he normally was. Why wasn't he taking this seriously?

"No one said you had to decide this second. She's not going anywhere. Not after all the trouble she went through to get here. You've got plenty of time to think it through."

Think what through? "There's nothing _to_ think through. Melanie _is_ dead. But…I can't—I can't—Jeb, I can't just…" My voice was breaking, wavering out of my control. Surely he understood. I'd known that body so intimately, loved the woman inside so passionately that I just couldn't…

Couldn't kill it.

I could be angry with it. Hate it, even. The first thing I'd done was raise a hand to it. But I couldn't kill Melanie.

"Don't think about it, then," Jeb replied. "Maybe you'll figure something out later. Give it some time."

How would things improve with time? There was no way this situation would change. Eventually I'd have to choose. And there was really only one choice.

"What are we going to _do_ with it? We can't keep watch on it around the clock."

"That's exactly what we're going to have to do for a while. Things will calm down. Even Kyle can't preserve a murderous rage for more than a few weeks."

"A few _weeks?_" I repeated in astonishment. "We can't afford to play guard down here for a few weeks." I couldn't, especially. I had a fourteen-year-old kid who looked to me like I was his father. I couldn't hope that _no one_ had told him where I was, what had happened. He had to know Mel's body was here, and that had to hurt him. He needed me. "We have other things—"

"I know, I know. I'll figure something out."

I threw out another argument, hoping Jeb would be convinced to make the decision for me. "And that's only half the problem. Where do we keep it? It's not like we have a cell block."

Jeb didn't see that as a problem, though. "You're not going to give us any trouble, now are you?" Not to me. To Mel. To it.

He was talking to it. Casually. Like it was human. "Jeb," I muttered.

"Oh, don't worry about her. First of all, we'll keep an eye on her. Second of all, she'd never be able to find her way out of here. She'd wander around lost until she ran into somebody." I did appreciate the way he'd implied that the exit was a long way from here. It showed that he hadn't completely turned in his sanity card and trusted this monster. "Which leads us to number three: she's not that stupid." He turned to the parasite, who stared back at him with a slightly distant look in its—Melanie's—eyes. "You're not going to go looking for Kyle or any of the rest of them, are you? I don't think any of them are very fond of you."

It didn't answer. Perhaps it wanted out so badly it _would_ go out looking.

"I wish you wouldn't talk to it like that," I said in a low voice. It irked me. There was no way I could treat this parasite, this worm, like a human. Because it was Mel; it had _killed_ Mel.

"I was raised in a politer time, kid. I can't help myself." He patted my arm gently. "Look, you've had a full night. Let me take the next watch here. Go get some sleep."

Was it night already? I didn't feel tired at all. Just drained. Emotionally drained. Mentally exhausted.

I looked into Melanie's silver eyes, feeling a fresh wave of hate for it. Jeb was right; I was ready to get away from it. "Whatever you want, Jeb." I trusted him to keep it safe, away from anyone who'd kill her. And from Jamie.

I tried once more to shrug off the weight that Jeb had forcibly placed on my shoulders. "And…I don't—I _won't_—accept responsibility for that thing. Kill it if you think it's best." I tried to sound like that would be okay. Maybe it would be if I wasn't the one to make the decision. I would have to harden myself. But I had already lost Melanie once; surely I could give up a twisted puppet of her.

The parasite flinched at that. It must have known that it was eventually going to die.

Giving it a parting scowl, I walked down the tunnel, away from Melanie, away from the ghosts of my happier past.

I made my way to my room, the tower-like cave I shared with Jamie. I could barely make him out in the starlight, but he was there, sleeping, sprawled across the middle of the mattress we shared. As I moved him over to one side, I could feel wetness on the pillow, close to where his eyes had been. He'd been crying.

He was also clutching something. Something hard and rectangular. I gently worked it free from his arms, feeling strange grooves in the smooth surface.

Of course. This was Mel's photo album. The one with the lines carved on the back, the one with the picture of the ranch in the desert. The one with Stryder family pictures in it.

I could picture the kid, having heard from some insensitive mouth about Mel's body, coming in here, staring at the pictures of his dead family for hours, silently mourning them, until the light grew too dim to see.

My throat grew thick. I felt my eyes fill, but I blinked the tears away fiercely. I had already mourned for Melanie once. No need to do it again.

I lay down on the mattress beside Jamie. It took me a long time to fall asleep.

* * *

**This part of the story is a DRAG. Both in the emotional content and in terms of length. I'll try to have the next chapter up soon, but...oh, boy. It gets even worse from here.**

**Thank you for reading KylerM.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Oh. My. Gosh. I am so glad I finally finished this. It was SO TEDIOUS. I set aside a rare weekend where I didn't have anything to do and got it all done. It was long and hard, but I survived!**

* * *

Morning light streamed through the openings in the lofty roof. I groaned and stretched, feeling that Jamie was no longer lying beside me.

When I sat up, he was watching me. Sitting cross-legged at the foot of our bed, his shoulders tense…accusation in his eyes. I knew he knew, but I wasn't going to say anything about it. I'd pretend it was nothing.

"Morning, kid."

He didn't say anything.

"S'it breakfast time yet?"

He shrugged. Despite his efforts to remain nonchalant, stoic, I saw the reproach and the sadness in his eyes. He knew, and he was suffering almost as much as I was.

"Okay. I'll go see."

And I left him to his silence.

As I made my way to the dining hall, people stopped and stared. Turned and whispered to others. I could guess what they were thinking: Had I killed the parasite? If not, why was I keeping it alive? What was I up to?

I grabbed a roll at the counter, deliberately meeting all the furtive glances I was receiving. Brandt and Aaron, sitting with Andy and a few other guys, had harder expressions on their faces; glares almost. Brandt must've told them all that I'd defended the parasite. Fought for it.

I leaned against the counter as I ate, my jaw working hard to soften the rough, seedy wheat bread. I watched the entrance carefully, expecting Jamie to show up. He never missed a meal. But he didn't come.

He must've been more hurt than I thought.

A few minutes into my surveillance, just as I was swallowing the last of my roll, Kyle and Ian strode into the dining cavern. They were both sweaty, and their dark hair was streaked with dust. Light brown dust. Kyle held a pair of binoculars.

I knew at once where they'd been. Outside. Spying on parasites that had gotten dangerously close. Searching. And there was only one thing they'd be searching for.

When he saw me, Kyle's face hardened and he stopped walking. Ian, with an exasperated glance behind him, kept coming, toward the roll basket, toward me.

"You wanna come outside?" he asked me, grabbing a roll for himself and, noticing Kyle's expectant glare, one for his brother.

"Why?"

Ian's expression was serious. "Just…to come see the situation." His jaw was bruised, I noticed.

I was surprised he could approach me so easily, after what I'd done last night. But, I realized, I didn't want to be angry at him either. Kyle had said one true thing last night: We were all family here.

I tried to quash the vindictive pleasure I felt when I saw the evidence he bore of our fight. Ian was much nicer, more considerate than Kyle. He didn't deserve to be hit…as much. He'd still tried to kill Melanie. I couldn't completely overlook that.

But he wasn't eyeing me nastily like Kyle. As the two of us neared him again, Kyle handed the binoculars wordlessly to Ian, snatched a roll from him, and stalked out of the dining hall.

I snorted at his childish behavior but sobered quickly, turning to Ian for information.

He informed me of the state of affairs outside as we headed for the southern tunnels—we both knew going down through the main exit, where the parasite was being kept, was out of the question. "Someone must have been expecting it. One bugger drove by on the road this morning and got out for a little while, then it left and brought more back. They're branching out now in little parties."

Just as I thought. The parasite in Melanie's body was going to bring down a legion on us. Smother us. Smoke us out. Kill us all.

My mind was analyzing the situation, evaluating any advantages we might have. "Can we leave any false trails?"

"It drove a car on its first leg here. Must've run out of gas. Aaron and Andy filled it up and took it right back to the edge of the road. Hopefully they'll think it just wrecked and leave it alone."

"They won't do that," I told him. They weren't just looking for the _parasite._ "It must have told the other Seekers it was going to find humans. They won't stop looking until they've found _us._"

We'd reached the southern cave. It was empty; Doc must have been somewhere else. We crawled through the low, narrow tunnel in silence, both of us preoccupied with our worries. What would we find out there? Was venturing out of the caves even safe now? Would our intruder force us to uproot our lives and go somewhere else less secure?

When we reached the outside, the sun was scorching hot even though it had only risen a little while ago. Ian and I made our way through the rocky formations, up to the top where we could see for miles.

Ian let me have the binoculars. I looked through them, quickly finding a group of people—parasites—clustered on the road. They'd parked their cars off the road and set up some type of camp. They were milling around casually, talking, looking at maps.

Their cars…most of them were nondescript, ordinary vehicles. But one stood out. A black and white one topped with lights.

Seekers.

As I watched, another car pulled up, black and white, and two more parasites got out.

"They're calling in Seekers," I told Ian, passing him the binoculars.

He watched the faraway scene briefly and remarked, "They haven't pulled out the big guns yet."

_"Yet,"_ I emphasized. The longer they looked and didn't find Melanie's body, they might guess it had found what it was looking for.

I didn't want to stick around to watch.

"I'll see you later," I muttered to Ian, sliding away from the rocky outcropping.

"You're not gonna stay?"

"No." I had the other half of the equation to worry about.

I reentered the caves, hearing voices as I reached the hospital. Doc was back, and Sharon was there too. When she saw me worm through the small opening, Sharon strode over to me. I could tell from her expression she still hadn't forgotten me disputing her yesterday.

"Where's Jamie?" she demanded.

I was caught off guard by this. "I don't…know?"

"He didn't come to school this morning."

Perplexed, I ran my hand over the back of my neck, pondering where the kid would be. He'd been so quiet, so miserable this morning. He had doubtless found out about Mel, so I'd assumed he was mourning her in his way…

Oh, no.

Without another word to Sharon or Doc, I strode out of the hospital wing, up the south tunnel, desperate to prove myself wrong.

Jamie's silence this morning…he'd been sad, yes, and angry with me. Surely he hadn't been planning, plotting to…

I was practically running now, as I crossed the main plaza. Jeb wouldn't let him. He was a smart man; surely he wouldn't let Jamie get near the parasite. He had to know what it was planning: manipulation, infiltration, betrayal…

But as I rounded the corner to the storage hole, there were three figures in the lamplight. Jeb, propped against the wall lazily, the gun on his lap. The parasite, curled against the opposite wall. Sitting next to Jamie.

"What the _heck?_" I exclaimed, stopping in my tracks. The parasite and Jamie spun to face me, but Jeb remained relaxed. I directed my fury toward him. "Dang it, Jeb! We agreed not to—"

"Jeb didn't bring me here," Jamie interrupted, his high voice defiant. "But _you_ should have."

Jeb started to get to his feet slowly, lazily. The gun rolled off his knees onto the floor…right next to the parasite.

Panic consumed me then. How could he be so careless? The parasite could grab the gun and be the death of us all. My feet carried me forward and I snatched the rifle. "Are you trying to get us _killed?!_"

"Calm down, Jared," Jeb drawled, taking the gun from me. He still sounded unruffled, albeit a little frustrated. Although that seemed to be, for some strange reason, directed at _me._ "She wouldn't touch this thing if I left it down here alone with her all night. Can't you see that?" He held the gun toward it, and it shrank back, as if it was afraid of the weapon.

It was a good actor.

"She's no Seeker, this one," Jeb declared. He sounded sure of himself.

"Shut up, Jeb, just shut up!" It had Jeb fooled. Jeb, the one who saw the invasion before anyone else. Jeb, who had hiding places ready long before they were needed. He was the reason we were all still alive, but he was being suckered by this one parasite, the one that had such a strong connection to him. Why couldn't he see through it?

"Leave him alone! He didn't do anything wrong!" Jamie cried.

"You! You get out of here now, or so help me!"

The kid had already been talking to the parasite when I showed up. Talking with it. Building a _relationship_ with it. He didn't understand the farce, the motions it was going through to earn our trust. He was too taken in by the face, the voice, all the familiarities.

Sure enough, upon hearing my mandate, he planted himself where he was next to the parasite. Already taking its side.

My fists came up involuntarily, a response to my anger. Of course I couldn't hurt the kid, but I'd do what I had to in order to make him leave. I was so angry with the parasite, with Jeb, with myself, I couldn't help but vent it somehow. Jamie's irrational behavior wasn't helping either.

The parasite watched our confrontation mutely, a horrified expression on its face. Why would it be so unhappy? It had won this victory, the heart of this vital child; surely it would be rejoicing.

"You shouldn't have tried to keep this a secret from me," Jamie hissed, his anger showing. He was angry at _me_. Because of _it_. "And you shouldn't have hurt her." He pointed at Melanie, where I could see even in the lamplight, big bruises on her face and neck.

I was so beside myself, I actually spat on the floor. Jamie already thought of the parasite as a _her_. A human. "That's not Melanie. She's never coming back, Jamie." She was dead; I'd told him that straight off when she disappeared.

"That's her face," Jamie told me. So stubborn, which would have made me proud, except he was so wrong. "And her neck. Don't those bruises there _bother_ you?"

Yes. That was the problem. The bruises _were_ bothering me. And I knew they shouldn't.

I closed my eyes, trying to regain control of myself. "You will either leave right now, Jamie, and give me some space, or I will _make_ you leave. I am not bluffing. I can't deal with any more right now, okay? I'm at my limit. So can we _please_ have this conversation later?"

I opened my eyes, meeting Jamie's. He must have understood that this was hurting me. "Sorry," he said softly. Grudgingly. "I'll go. But I'm not promising that I won't come back."

Why would he want to come back? To bond more with the parasite? That he wanted to get to know Melanie's body snatcher filled me with fear. "I can't think about that now. Go. Please," I added at the end, to soften my order.

Jamie looked at the parasite. Curiosity, longing, and reluctance mixed into his expression. No fear. No anger.

When he walked away, I promised myself that that was the last time he'd see it. No matter how long I kept the parasite here, I wouldn't allow him anywhere near it again. He absolutely could not get latched on to this thing.

But I'd broken promises to myself before.

If I was going to keep Jamie away from Melanie's body, I'd have to stay down here with it. Jeb obviously couldn't be trusted with that.

"You too," I ordered Jeb.

"I don't think you've had a long enough break, to be honest. I'll keep an eye on—"

"Go." I cut him off before he could say _her_ again. Sure, Jeb would watch the parasite, but he had let Jamie see it. Talk to it. Earlier, I'd thought the kid needed me to be with him. But he needed me to keep this thing away from him more. Even if he didn't know it.

Jeb didn't argue. "Okay. Sure."

I had a question. I had to know this, especially after his lax behavior. "Jeb."

"Yeah?"

"If I asked you to shoot it now, would you do it?"

He didn't turn around. "I'd have to. I follow my own rules. So don't ask me unless you really mean it."

I couldn't mean it now. Not yet. So I let him go, let Melanie's body crawl back into the storage hole.

I sat down outside the hole, prepared for a long wait.

...

The day didn't disappoint.

The parasite and I sat in silence, by no means a companionable silence. The entire day, I wrestled back and forth with the wisdom of my options.

Should I kill the parasite?

Leaving it alive ad infinitum was stupid; I knew it wanted to escape. Jamie had already found it, connected with it, played right into its deceitful hands. If for no other reason, I should kill it for Jamie. That kid needed to understand how dangerous Mel's body was now.

But killing it…would be incredibly painful. Watching Melanie's body fall, blood pooling from a gunshot wound…Yes, it would be a gunshot wound, because there was no way Doc was getting near it with his scalpels and poison. But even just shooting the parasite...I couldn't comprehend the agony of that picture.

But having Melanie, who was not Melanie, be here next to me, was incredibly painful too. Sitting with it for hours, the being that had killed the woman I loved, was excruciating.

It was a stalemate. I suffered if it died, or if it lived. One option would win out eventually; I just didn't want to be the one to force it.

It must have been dinnertime when Jeb brought food for us. He gave me a tray, and set one inside the hole for the parasite.

"Thank you," it whispered.

"You're welcome," he answered.

Why did he talk to it that way? Why did he act so civil toward it? It didn't deserve politeness. The only reason _it_ was polite was to gain our trust. So why did Jeb play along with it?

I grunted softly, to express my annoyance to Jeb. He ignored me and left.

All day, I could hear the parasite moving around inside the hole. Trying to find a comfortable position. It never stayed still for more than a few minutes; the hole was just too small and round.

I didn't let myself feel sorry for it.

Jeb came back in the evening and offered to take it for a walk. To the latrine. It nodded enthusiastically at that, and suspicion flooded my mind. It had to have gone to the bathroom before; had it learned or guessed the way out? Jeb was so trusting of it, he might have just _told_ it where the exit was.

"I'll do it," I told him roughly. "Give me the gun." I didn't trust him or anyone else to keep it secure. I had to do everything myself.

Jeb sighed but gave his consent. "Go ahead."

I snatched the gun from him and walked quickly down the dark tunnel, not waiting for the parasite. I heard its soft, uncertain footsteps behind me, stumbling every so often on the bumpy floor. I even heard it gasp quietly and _thump_ to the ground. I stopped walking for a moment and waited for it to get on its feet. I didn't want it to be on its _own_ in this dark tunnel.

It footsteps got closer, and then I felt a light touch on my back. I twisted away from the touch in fear, though realizing quickly that the parasite had been feeling for the wall. That didn't make me feel any better.

"Sorry," it whispered to me.

The moon was out in the big room. I led it to the latrine, grateful that everyone seemed to have gone to bed.

When we reached the river room, it moved hesitantly toward the dark bathing cave. Taking its time.

"Move it," I told it sharply. If it was planning something…could I kill it?

Thankfully, I didn't have to answer that question. It returned quickly after that, and I led it back to the storage hole, even faster than before.

Jeb had left, come back with mats and pillows. Disgust rose in me as I realized he'd brought two. One for me and one for _it._ Like he expected me to sleep _beside_ it.

"Are you sleeping here tonight or am I?"

There was no question about that. "I am. And I only need one bedroll." It was _not_ sleeping on a mattress beside me. It didn't deserve that.

Seeing Jeb's incredulous expression, I retorted, "It's not one of us, Jeb. You left this on me, so butt out."

"It's not an animal, either, kid."

No. It was worse.

"And you wouldn't treat a dog this way."

I looked him straight in the eye. I wasn't budging on this matter.

"Never figured you for a cruel man," Jeb said quietly. Trying to provoke me into relenting.

Cruelty? This whole situation was cruel enough. The parasite's torture of me entitled me to a _little_ payback.

He touched its arm companionably as he walked away, carrying a bedroll and a pillow. "Sorry, honey."

"Cut that _out!_" I said harshly. This humane treatment had to stop.

Jeb had left me the gun this time, as an extra means of protecting the parasite. I laid my bedroll out beside it, between the gun and the hole. As I patted my pillow, I allowed myself a little more payback, plumping it ostentatiously so the parasite could see.

_Sweet dreams, backache,_ I thought, with a wave of satisfaction.

"You won't be able to sneak past me," I told it. Warning it. "If you try…I _will_ kill you."

I had the gun now, so I could probably keep it from escaping without killing it. But if it forced my hand, I would do what I had to. Never mind how it made me feel.

I laid down on the thin mat, staying as alert as possible in my exhaustion. Again, it took me a long time to fall asleep.

I dreamed of Melanie again. The night I found her.

I woke with my eyes stinging.

I sat down there for days. Four, at least. I had Jeb bring food for me and the parasite, leaving it at the end of the straight corridor so he couldn't talk to it anymore.

I took it to use the bathroom periodically, trusting my instincts to only leave at night, when no one else could see it.

Kyle came to see me every night. He was "just checking." I never let him get close; I never said a word to him.

The parasite was a surprisingly docile prisoner. It was quiet all the time; it never tried to leave the hole until I stood up, ready to take it to the latrine. Once, though, for some strange reason, it laughed at me as I ate Cheetos. That bugged me.

I gradually moved away from the hole. I hated being near the parasite. Every time I looked at it…it brought back memories. I kept my distance so as to not get soft. Every day the centipede did nothing chipped away at me, nagging me. It wasn't trying to escape. It wasn't doing _anything._

I pushed these thoughts away. It was biding its time. It was planning, strategizing, conspiring…

One night I was lying on the mat—that uncomfortable, thin mat—not quite asleep, when I heard footsteps. In one movement, I rolled over, grabbing the gun and aiming it at Kyle, like always.

"Easy. I come in peace."

"Whatever you're selling, I'm not buying," I called back to him. Kyle never came in peace.

"I just want to talk." Oh. It was Ian. "You're buried down here, missing all the important discussions. We miss your take on things."

"I'm _sure._" More like they missed arguing with me. I didn't relax my defensive stance as Ian came closer.

"Oh, put the gun down. If I was planning to fight you, I would have come with four guys this time."

I weighed this. Ian couldn't match me in a fight alone, especially since I had the gun. And he _would_ be one just to come and talk to me.

"How's your brother these days?" I asked him, sliding to sit down against the wall. I wondered if Kyle had stopped pouting. Whenever he came down to "just check," he'd just seemed angry. Like always.

"Still fuming about his nose. Oh, well—it's not the first time it's been broken. I'll tell him you were sorry," Ian offered.

"I'm not," I said sincerely.

"I know. No one is ever sorry for hitting Kyle."

I laughed. Ian had been the first one to punch his brother in the nose, back when they were teenagers.

He really didn't seem to be looking for a fight. He sat down facing me, crossing his legs comfortably.

"So what do you want, Ian? Not just an apology for Kyle, I imagine."

"Did Jeb tell you?"

I hadn't spoken to Jeb in days. "I don't know what you're talking about." Had something happened?

"They've given up the search. Even the Seekers."

Oh. The parasites outside, searching for the one I held captive. They'd given up? When I'd been out there, more Seekers were just arriving, as if the situation was becoming more serious.

Ian continued. "We've been keeping a close watch for some change, but they never seemed overly anxious. The search never strayed from the area where we abandoned the car, and for the past few days they were clearly looking for a body than a survivor."

This parasite must have been _really_ stupid. It had ventured out into the deadly desert without any backup, just searching on its own for humans to betray. Inefficient supplies, barely a formulated plan, just its memories—Melanie's memories.

"Then two nights ago we caught a lucky break. The search party left some trash in the open, and a pack of coyotes raided their base camp. One of them was coming back late and surprised the animals. The coyotes attacked and dragged the Seeker a good hundred yards into the desert before the rest of them heard its screams and came to the rescue. The other Seekers were armed, of course. They scared the coyotes off easily, and the victim wasn't seriously hurt, but the event seems to have answered any questions they might have had about what happened to our guest here."

They were right about that. If Melanie's body had stayed out in the desert for this amount of time, with no provisions, it would have been picked apart by scavengers, beyond recognition. Was it better that we'd found it?

"So they packed up and left. The Seekers gave up the search. All the volunteers went home. No one is looking for it."

We both glanced into the hole. Our shadows kept it in darkness, curled against the back wall. I couldn't tell if it was listening.

Ian went on, "I imagine it's been declared officially dead, if they keep track of things the way we used to. Jeb's been saying 'I told you so' to anyone who'll stand still long enough to hear it."

"Jeb needs to get a hold of himself," I muttered to myself. The old man had been way too reckless about this thing. He should have shot it when he first found it. I exhaled sharply and said louder, "All right, then. I guess that's the end of it." Strangely enough, one of our worries had resolved itself. The other parasites had surmised that no one could've survived for this long in the inhospitable desert and decided it had died. Now all _we_ had to do was decide if that should be true or not.

"That's what it looks like." Ian hesitated then. "Except…well, it's probably nothing at all."

Of course. Of course there was a catch. "Go on." I had to know everything.

"No one but Kyle thinks much of it, and you know how Kyle is. You've got the best instincts for this kind of thing. I wanted your opinion. That's why I'm here, taking my life into my hands to infiltrate enemy territory," Ian said, his voice becoming sarcastic and biting by the end. "You see, there's this one…a Seeker, no doubt about that—it packs a Glock."

That surprised me. Most parasites, even the Seekers, didn't carry weapons. There were, though, obviously a few exceptions.

"Kyle was the first to notice how this one stood out. It didn't seem important to the rest—certainly not part of the decision-making process. Oh, it had suggestions enough, from what we could see, but no one seemed to listen to it. Wish we could've heard what it was saying. Anyway, when they called off the search, this one wasn't happy with the decision. You know how the parasites are always so…very pleasant? This was weird—it's the closest I've ever seen them come to an argument. Not a real argument, because none of the others argued back, but the unhappy one sure looked like it was arguing with _them_."

No wonder Kyle had noticed this particular centipede. It was pugnacious—like him. He wasted all his energy picking fights, even though none of us cared enough to fight back. But I'd never seen a parasite like that.

"The core group of Seekers disregarded it," Ian said. "They're all gone now."

"But the unhappy one?" I pressed.

"It got in a car and drove halfway to Phoenix. Then it drove back to Tucson. Then it drove west again."

"Still searching." Perhaps that one knew something the others didn't.

"Or very confused. It stopped at that convenience store by the peak. Talked to the parasite that worked there, though that one had already been questioned."

"Huh."

"Then it went for a hike up the peak. Stupid little thing. Had to be burning alive, wearing black from head to toe."

I was about to laugh at its stupidity—it was as stupid as the one in Mel's body, wandering in the desert like that—but then there was a noise from the hole.

The parasite had curled itself into a tiny ball at the back of the hole, gasping in fear.

"What was that?" Ian peered past me into the hole.

I grabbed the lamp and looked at it myself. I still didn't trust Ian with it.

"Look at its eyes," Ian whispered to me. "It's frightened." He was right—the parasite peeked up at us, its eyes wide and terrified.

What had scared it? Had it realized that there was no hope for rescue? Was it afraid that we would kill it now?

No, we'd been talking about that for several minutes now. It was when Ian had mentioned the Seeker, the one who wasn't giving up, the one who was still looking…

"Who is the Seeker in black?" I asked it.

It stared back at me, shaking. I knew I'd guessed right.

"I know you can talk. You talk to Jeb and Jamie. And now you're going to talk to me."

It still didn't say anything, so I bent over and forced myself into the hole. It was so tiny I couldn't stand up, had to kneel to face it, almost at eye-level. I probably didn't look as threatening as I needed to.

"Tell me what you know," I demanded. When it didn't answer, I raised my voice. "Who is the Seeker in black? Why is it still searching?"

The parasite hid its face. It must have thought I was going to hit it.

It could be right. It was trying my patience.

"Ah, Jared?" Ian said. He moved behind me, trying to get into the hole, too. "Maybe you should let me—"

"Stay out of it!" Ian couldn't help matters. The last time he'd been near the parasite, he'd been choking it to death.

"Can't you see it's too scared to talk? Leave it alone—"

I whirled and punched him again. He fell completely out of the hole, his hand over his mouth.

"That's twice," he groaned, spitting a dark red glob on the floor.

"I'm ready to go for three," I warned him. This situation, Mel's body, was pushing me over the edge—I'd never hit Ian before. Only Kyle.

I took the lamp from the ground and brought it back into the hole, illuminating the parasite. It was…really dirty. "Who—is—the—Seeker?" I accentuated each word, trying to communicate how deadly serious I was.

It looked at me more squarely, studying my face. What was it thinking? I stared back at it intently, trying to focus on the silver in its eyes—not on the face that used to be Melanie's.

"I don't have to hurt you," I told it. "But I _do_ have to know the answer to my question. Tell me."

"The Seeker," it said, a little hoarsely.

"We already know it's a Seeker."

"No, not just any Seeker. _My_ Seeker."

"What do you mean, your Seeker?" I asked, puzzled. Wasn't it a Seeker itself?

"Assigned to me. Following me. She's the reason—"

"The reason?" I had gotten it talking. No need for me to scare it into silence.

"The reason I ran away. The reason I came here."

"You ran away from a Seeker? But you're one of them!" I exclaimed, confused. Then I realized: This whole thing was an act. Its fear, its hesitation—this story had been planned out for a long time. It had just been waiting for a plausible time to tell it: After the search for it stopped, after we thought it was completely alone and helpless. Then it would begin to dupe us.

I played along. "Why would it follow you? What did it want?"

The parasite whispered, "She wanted you. You and Jamie."

My face settled back into a glare. This seemed true, at least. Although why would it admit to that?

"And you were trying to lead it here?" That was the only reason. It had failed in that, at least. Sure, Melanie had seen the lines often enough, but Maggie and I had had to work together to figure out what they meant. Melanie, thankfully, hadn't known.

"I didn't…I…" It trailed off.

"What?" I prompted. Still brusque, but gentler than before. If I played nice, I might be able to worm a portion of truth out of its lies.

"I didn't want to tell her. I don't like her."

That was unexpected. "Don't you all have to like everybody?" Ian had said it earlier; all the parasites were so agreeable. They all acted the same, were friendly to everyone. Why was this one different?

"We're supposed to," it said. It seemed embarrassed. Like it was ashamed of not liking someone. I wondered vaguely how it felt about all of us—was it ashamed of hating us humans? Obviously not—it had come here to turn us all in.

"Who did you tell about this place?" Ian broke in.

The parasite didn't seem any more scared of him than me. "I couldn't tell—I didn't know. I just saw the lines. The lines on the album. I drew them for the Seeker…but we didn't know what they were. She still thinks they're a road map."

"What do you mean you didn't know what they were? You're _here_." I gestured at it, emphasizing my point. It must have figured the puzzle out sometime. But why would it come by itself if there was another one looking for us?

It was talking again. Saying something…unexpected. "I…I was having trouble with my…with the…with her memory."

Anguish flooded through me. This was the first time the parasite had said anything about its body's former inhabitant. It hadn't even said her name, but whether it knew or not, the parasite was running its razor blades down my pain.

"I didn't understand. I couldn't access everything. There were walls. That's why the Seeker was assigned to me, waiting for me to unlock the rest."

I turned around to look at Ian. His face mirrored my surprise. What was it saying? It couldn't…access Melanie's mind? What _walls_ was it talking about?

Could Melanie have made those walls? Blocked the dangerous memories in her last minutes?

Of course not. That was impossible. The parasite was making things up. Telling us things we wanted to hear. Playing us.

"Were you able to _access_ my cabin?" I snapped. I remembered finding Melanie's last note. _Don't go home, _it had said. Had the parasite told the other Seekers about my father's cabin in the canyon?

"Not for a long time."

So the defenses could be breached. Obviously. "And then you told the Seeker," I guessed.

"No."

"No? Why not?" I probed, shocked.

"Because…by the time I could remember it…I didn't want to tell her."

I lowered my voice. It was stalling, trying to better direction its lies. "_Why_ didn't you want to tell her?" I only reluctantly used the feminine pronoun. To encourage it.

It looked square at me, defiance flashing in its silver-rimmed eyes.

This question was sensitive to it. It didn't want to tell us this answer. Or maybe it didn't _have_ an answer. A conceivable lie. There _was_ no reason it shouldn't have wanted to tell another Seeker.

I accepted this and moved on. "Why weren't you able to access everything? Is that…normal?" Did everyone who was caught have some control over what the parasite saw?

The parasite hesitated, then answered. Its tone was different now. Flatter. More rehearsed. "She fell a long way. The body was damaged."

I tilted my head, eyeing it doubtfully. This was obviously a lie. So obvious that it had to be planned. Everything was a lie; all those lies had to be contrasted with something even more false. So we would believe the rest of it.

It had said…it had said Melanie had _fallen_. A long way. What had she done? How had she been hurt? Obviously her body was fine, but the parasite had just told me she had fallen, presumably in her last minutes. Was it lying about that? How much pain had she gone through?

In my distressed silence, Ian asked another question. "Why isn't this Seeker giving up like the rest?"

The parasite leaned back against the curved wall. "I don't know. She's not like other souls. She's _annoying_."

Ian laughed once in astonishment. The parasite had almost…complained. About another parasite. Soul, it had said.

It had made it sound more human.

"Are you like other…souls?" I used its word instead of mine again.

The parasite looked at me again tiredly. Put its head down. Curled into a ball.

Its charade was over. I had doubtless asked it too many questions it hadn't already made up answers for.

I crawled backward out of the hole, my knees and back throbbing. As I stretched my body out again, Ian whispered to me: "That was unexpected."

"Lies, of course," I said in an equally hushed tone. Yes, that was the most it had said since coming here, but it had obviously prepared for this moment. A moment to open up to us, to gain our trust. "Only…I can't quite figure out what it wants us to believe. Where it's trying to lead us." All I could tell was that it wanted us to believe it. Believe that it had run away, looking to find us, but not to betray us.

"I don't think it's lying. Well, except the one time. Did you notice?"

Of course. It lied worse than a kindergartener with chocolate-stained hands. Something so unbelievable had to be intentional. "Part of the act."

"Jared, when have you ever met a parasite who could lie about anything? Except a Seeker, of course."

Ian was missing the point. "Which it must be."

"Are you serious?" He actually looked surprised. Like he'd believed it.

"It's the best explanation." The _only_ explanation. Parasites didn't just up and decide to move in with humans.

"She—_it_—" he amended, seeing my expression. "—is the furthest thing from a Seeker I've seen. If a Seeker had any idea how to find us, they would have brought an army."

"And they wouldn't have found anything," I countered. "But she—" I caught myself. "—_it_—got in, didn't it?"

"It's almost been _killed_ half a dozen—"

"Yet it's still breathing, isn't it?" I shot back. Why didn't he see? What he was envisioning was too good to be true. The parasite could _not_ have come out here meaning us no harm.

He was quiet. I allowed myself to calm down. This drama, a parasite in Mel's body, had me entangled. I wasn't reacting rationally, I knew. But I was _thinking_ rationally.

"I think I'm going to go talk to Jeb," Ian said after a while.

"Oh, _that's_ a great idea." Just what Ian needed—to discuss things with the only person in the caves who'd gone soft on parasites. I didn't need Ian turning that way too.

"Do you remember that first night? When it jumped in front of you and Kyle? That was bizarre."

I did remember. How worried I'd been about it. How I'd almost been taken in by its sham of protecting me. "It was just trying to find a way to stay alive, to escape." A second later, it had run down the tunnel, like it was trying to get away.

"By giving Kyle the go-ahead to kill her—it? Good plan."

"It worked."

"Jeb's _gun_ worked. Did she know he was on his way?" He didn't even correct himself this time.

My next words came out in an exasperated groan. "You're overthinking this, Ian. That's what it wants." He was analyzing every technical detail, trying to ferret out the parasite's motivation. The problem was that its motivation was already painfully clear: it wanted to _destroy_ us. Its being in Melanie's body didn't affect my perception of _that_ at all.

"I don't think you're right. I don't know why…but I don't think she wants us to think about her at all." He stood up, stretched. Then he spoke, in a louder voice than before. "You know what's really twisted?"

"What's that?"

"I felt guilty—_guilty_—watching her flinch away from us. Seeing the black marks on her neck."

I speculated if the increase in volume had been deliberate. If he was conspicuously acknowledging remorse for those bruises.

The bruises that _he'd_ put there. Trying to kill it. He felt guilty about them. Did…did he wish he hadn't done it?

Although I didn't want it dead at the moment, I was suddenly scared of what his revelation would entail. "You can't let it get to you like that. It's not human. Don't forget that."

Ian started walking away. "Just because she isn't human, do you think she doesn't feel pain? That she doesn't feel just like a girl who's been beaten—_beaten_—by us?"

It had to be easier for him. He'd never known _Melanie_. All he saw in there was a girl. A scared, pitiful girl. He didn't see the change that I did. "Get a hold of yourself."

"See you around, Jared." He disappeared around the corner.

I didn't feel like sleeping anymore. I got up and paced the width of the corridor. Back and forth.

Mel's body was toying with me. It was manipulating everyone here. It had gotten to Jeb. It had met Jamie only briefly, but he had already been defending it against me. And now Ian was feeling remorse for almost killing it. Like he felt sympathy for it. Like he didn't hate it.

What had gotten into them?

I sat down on the mat again. Leaned my elbows on my knees. "Got to make a decision," I mumbled. "Can't let it stay here. Can't let it sucker everyone."

The list of people I had to keep it away from was growing. Jamie. Jeb. And now Ian.

How long could this go on?

The parasite shifted in its hole. I jumped, already annoyed at myself. It was just stretching out to sleep.

How long before I softened too? How long before my feelings for Melanie overshadowed my fear of this threat?

"Guilty," I scoffed. "Letting it get to him. Just like Jeb, like Jamie. Can't let this go on. Stupid to let it live."

I didn't get to sleep. After a few hours in more silence, my world was turned upside down again.

At the sound of more footsteps, I grabbed the gun and aimed it at the trespasser.

"'S just me. Don't get worked up." It was Jeb.

I cocked the gun in response.

He kept coming toward me. "Go ahead and shoot me, kid. Go ahead."

"Please leave." I didn't know what Jeb wanted, but it couldn't be good. He probably wasn't bringing bad news, but he probably wanted to talk about the thing I'd been trying to avoid thinking about for almost a week.

"Need to talk to you," he said affably. Throwing a nod in the direction of the hole, he greeted the parasite easily. "Hey there."

"You know how much I hate that."

"Yep." He probably did it just to annoy me. Bugger.

He'd probably come to tell me about the parasites abandoning their missing persons search. "Ian already told me about the Seekers…"

"I know. I was just talking with him about it."

"Great." Ian had done what he said. Talked to Jeb. Probably filled his head with more crazy ideas. Next, he'd want to assimilate the parasite. Introduce it to everyone and let it have the run of the place. Wasn't happening. "Then what do you want?"

"Not so much what I want. It's what everybody _needs_. We're runnin' low on just about everything. We need a real comprehensive supply run."

"Oh." He was asking me to lead a raid party. Something I usually…well, I didn't _enjoy_ it, but going outside gave me a sense of purpose. Made me focus, forget all my personal problems.

But now was _not_ the best time. How badly did he need this raid? "Send Kyle," I told Jeb. Challenging him.

"Okay."

Oops. I hadn't actually meant for him to…The old man was calling my bluff. "No. Not Kyle. He's too…" Rash. Impulsive. A terrible decision-maker.

Jeb laughed; he understood. "Almost got us in some real hot water last time he was out alone, didn't he? Not one to think things through. Ian, then?"

I sighed internally. My conversation with Ian was still fresh on my mind. "He thinks things through _too_ much."

A smile was growing on Jeb's face. He was just toying with me now. "Brandt?"

"He's no good for the long trips. Starts getting panicked a few weeks in. Makes mistakes." I knew exactly where he was going with this.

"Okay, you tell me who then."

I didn't answer him. On one hand, going on a weeks-long raid would be a good respite. A break from the torture I'd been imposing on myself for the past week or so.

On the other hand, who would guard it if I left? Jeb was the leader of this place; he couldn't hole up here like I had. And there was no one else I trusted to keep it alive. If I left…would it die?

Yes. It would. Without a round-the-clock babysitter like me, someone would find it. And kill it.

"Ian and Kyle together?" Jeb suggested. "Maybe they could balance each other out."

I sighed aloud this time. "Like last time?" It hadn't gone well at all. The brothers had been at each other's throats the entire trip, and they had slipped up inside a house. Alerted nearby parasites to their presence. We'd had to abort the raid, coming back with practically nothing.

I didn't want that to happen again. "Okay, okay. I know it has to be me." I just didn't know how that was possible.

"You're the best," Jeb praised me. "You changed our lives when you showed up here."

I motioned with my head toward the hole. I wasn't sure if the parasite was awake or not. "What about…"

"I'll keep an eye on her when I can. And I'll expect you to take Kyle with you. That oughta help."

"That won't be enough, Kyle gone and you keeping an eye on her _when you can,_" I told him. Any moment the parasite was alone was a moment it could die.

Jeb shrugged. Indifferently. Nonchalantly. "I'll do my best. That's all I can do."

He didn't seem to care much about it now. There were clearly more important things to worry about here. He would protect it as best he could, but…it wasn't going to be enough.

"How long can you stay down here?" he prodded.

"I don't know."

I realized then, as I answered him, what he was doing. He was giving me a gift. In his own strange way, this was his answer.

He knew I'd never be able to come to any conclusions about Melanie. I was too attached. So she—it—was consuming me.

If I left now…if I gave up my vigilance and let someone kill it—and I knew they would, if it was unprotected—wouldn't that be the best solution?

Jeb had known this. He'd probably been planning this the whole time. Kept it alive so it could die in the way that would hurt me least.

Crazy old man.

I exhaled, letting all the exhaustion, the indecision, the pain, the grief—everything the parasite had caused me—out.

I could escape this. I could leave, and when I came back, the problem would be gone. No, I wouldn't be happy, but I could be at peace.

I could take care of Jamie. Help him become a man. Unhindered by this _obstacle._

Melanie could be at rest. My memory of her could be at rest. She would again be a ghost in my head, a reminder of happiness, not a twisted zombie here with me, teasing me about what could have been.

Could I do it?

"I'll leave tonight."

Yes. I could.

"That's probably best," Jeb said.

"I'll need to get some things organized," I mused. What I _really_ needed was to get away from this place as soon as possible.

"I'll take over here, then. Have a safe trip."

"Thanks. I guess I'll…see you when I see you, Jeb." Later. Never, if I was caught—caught dead.

"Guess so."

I got up quickly, relinquishing the gun. As I walked away from the blasted storage hole, far, far away, I relinquished responsibility for Melanie. She—her body—was my past. Behind me. Done with.

Right before I exited the long, twisty corridor, I thought I heard a sob behind me. A high, feminine sob.

I'd made it cry.

...

I decided to take several guys. I needed the extra muscle…and oddly enough, the company.

Jeb had told me to take Kyle, and I'd obey him on that. But Ian and Kyle together on a raid was unbearable. Ian could stay. He hated going out, anyway.

Besides, there was a slight, _faint_ chance that he'd come to his senses and take care of this. Finish what he started.

So I when I went to Kyle and Ian's room—I went there first because Kyle took the longest to wake up—I shook Kyle awake quietly. Leaving Ian, sprawled across his bed, in peace. His lower lip was slightly swollen.

I went to Brandt and Aaron's room next. They both got up easily, eager for a change, a challenge. As a last thought, I went to Paige and Andy's room and invited Andy. After he agreed to go, I left the room, letting him wake his partner up and tell her goodbye.

I pictured myself doing that and winced.

Briefly, I considered taking Jamie. I'd taken him before. The first raid I'd gone on here, he'd been so desolate at being left alone, I'd just taken him. He'd surprisingly become an asset. He was small and speedy, which was good for stealing.

But I decided against it. He'd been through enough these past few days. He didn't need to go risk his life. One parasite was enough for him.

We all met up in the southern tunnel. Again, using the main exit was out of the question.

When we got back it wouldn't be.

Kyle scowled at me, bleary-eyed from being awoken in the middle of the night. Dark bruises had formed under his eyes since I'd last seen him up close. When he spoke, his voice was surly. "Thought you'd buried yourself with a parasite."

"Yeah, what happened to that?" Andy interjected.

I shrugged, trying to seem indifferent. I _was_ indifferent. I didn't care that the parasite would die…only Melanie. "I gave it up."

"Good for you." Brandt pounded me on the back. I tried to smile.

"Okay, we've got people depending on us. C'mon."

We left the caves discreetly, slipping away like the thieves in the night we were about to become. Before the crack of dawn, we had stocked up in our supply cave and were driving away into the desert.

Once, long ago, when I was a different person, I'd promised myself never to let Melanie go. Never let her get away from me.

She had. She'd disappeared, died. And yet she haunted me.

She was gone. Dead. She, herself, had gotten away from me.

Now it was time for _me_ to _let_ her go. In my mind. I had to truly accept that she was gone.

I'd had my time with her. I didn't get forever. That was okay.

It was okay.

* * *

**Well then! I do realize there is a slight discrepancy from the book in this chapter. It says in the novel there are six guys who go on the raid, but I never have found the name of the sixth raider, so I just left him out. Whoever he is. :)**

**Can I just say again how glad I am that this part is over? Sure, it's poignant in its own way, but it's just depressing to communicate. ****Anyway, thanks again for reading! I've received five reviews so far, so thanks for that too!**

**Okay, I'm out. Thanks for reading KylerM.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi again! Chapter Six. Enjoy!**

* * *

_The kid has fallen asleep._

_Melanie watches him from the doorway, but she doesn't go in to join him. I've gladly given them the mattress in the tiny sleeping room. I don't mind. I'm still just so glad I have them._

_Jamie. He's such a _kid._ Unintentionally funny. But smart. And Melanie. Mel. So sweet, and witty. So young, yet so resilient against all the horrors she's faced. She is amazing._

_I'm relaxing in the big room, not quite ready to turn in on the couch that is too short for me. She comes and sits next to me, a smile on her face._

_"Thank you."_

_I imagine, from her fervent tone, that she means for everything. The way I gathered so much food for her that first night. How I protected her and Jamie as we journeyed to this canyon. How I tried my best to make friends with Jamie, to make the kid happy. To make Mel happy._

_Even if it wasn't the end of the world, even if we weren't the last humans alive, I would do the same thing just to see this girl smile this way._

_"I feel bad," she continues. "This couch is much too short for you. Maybe you should take the bed with Jamie."_

_She's always like this too. Selfless. She's too used to being the caretaker. "Mel, you're only a few inches shorter than I am," I refute her with a laugh. "Sleep comfortably, for once. Next time I'm out, I'll steal myself a cot or something."_

_She has stopped smiling, for some reason. Her face has become serious, almost…despondent._

_I put an arm around her shoulders. I don't want her to be unhappy. I want her to be as happy as I am, that we're here, that we have each other. "Why the frown?"_

_She takes a deep breath. "When will you…when will we have to leave again?" Placing herself with me. She doesn't want to be alone, either._

_"We scavenged enough on our way up that we're set for a few months. I can do a few short raids if you want to stay in one place for a while. I'm sure you're tired of running."_

_"Yes, I am." Another deep breath. "But if you go, I go."_

_She is incredibly brave. To want to risk her life just to stay with me. I hold her to me, so grateful I found this one girl, the one who'd follow me anywhere, just like I'd follow _her_ anywhere. "I'll admit, I'd prefer it that way. The thought of being separated from you…does it sound crazy to say that I'd rather die? Too melodramatic?" She's very sensible. Doesn't think like I do. Doesn't think with her heart._

_"No, I know what you mean."_

_She does? I _must_ have made her happy. Like she did me. Because ever since I found her, I'm elated. I don't know if I even felt this upbeat when my family was still alive._

_Mel's breathing accelerates, as if she's nervous. She drops her eyes. "I don't think you need to find a cot, not yet," she blurts._

_I'm confused by this. Does she just want to stay here, together, as long as possible? I don't blame her. I want to preserve, to draw out this feeling of elation. "We'll stay here until the food is gone, don't worry. I've slept on much worse things than this couch."_

_"That's not what I mean."_

_Is she still hung up on changing sleeping arrangements? I'm not going to allow her to sacrifice any more of herself. She's too special to me. "You get the bed, Mel. I'm not budging on that."_

_"That's not what I meant, either. I mean the couch is plenty big for Jamie. He won't outgrow it for a long time."_

_But if Jamie sleeps on the couch…_

_"I could share the bed…with you."_

_I'm struck dumb._

_Why does she say this? Does she feel the need to…repay me? Surely this is not a commonplace thing for her to offer. Her face is darker. She's embarrassed by saying it._

_"Mel, I…" I take her face in my hand, but she won't meet my eyes. She is so strong, so fierce, that this vulnerability is strange on her. Out of place._

_I feel strangely vulnerable too. And…hurt. That she thinks I'd demand that from her. Doesn't she? Why else would she ask this?_

_"You don't owe me that, Melanie. You don't owe me anything at all."_

_She inhales shakily. "I'm not saying—I didn't mean that I felt obligated. And…you shouldn't either. Forget I said anything."_

_"Not likely, Mel." I would never expect something like that of her. Never ask that. But I need to know why _she_ asks._

_She's quiet for a minute. I try to explain myself, to make her understand. I'm trying to not hurt her. "Mel, it doesn't have to be like that. Just because we're together, just because we're the last man and woman on Earth…That doesn't mean you have to do anything you don't want to. I'm not the kind of man who would expect…You don't have to…"_

_"That's not what I mean. 'Have to' is not what I'm talking about, and I don't think you're 'that kind of man.' No, of course not. It's just that—"_

_"Just that…?" She tries to shake her head, to refuse to tell me. "Mel?"_

_She pulls away from me. Uncomfortable. Mortified._

_I wonder…I wonder if she asked because…because she feels something. If she feels something when she looks at me, sees me smile. If she sees me as something more than just a fellow human._

_Does she think I feel less for her?_

_I have to know. "Will you talk to me? Please?" I lean over, tilting my head to meet her tentative gaze._

_She whispers. "If I could pick anyone at all to be stranded on a deserted planet with, it would be you. I always want to be with you. And not just…not just to talk to. When you touch me… I don't want you to stop." She runs her finger down my arm. Stroking it tenderly._

_It feels wonderful._

_I don't know when my affection for this girl turned into something more. I've just been so…happy to have her here, I haven't realized how much. Or why._

_I do love her. I already knew that. I felt like she was the sister I never had. And she's another human, which is amazing. But there's something else. Something about her. She herself—really who she is, not just _what_ she is—is amazing. She's incredible._

_"If you don't feel the same way, I understand. Maybe it isn't the same for you. That's okay."_

_But I do feel the same._

_"Oh, Mel." I lean in, letting our lips touch. More than touch._

_I told myself I'd have to be careful with her. She's so young. Fragile. I couldn't kiss her like I did that first night; it would be too much for her. Overwhelming._

_But she wants me. She loves me too._

_I tell her. "It was a miracle—more than a miracle—when I found you, Melanie. Right now, if I was given the choice between having the world back and having you, I wouldn't be able to give you up. Not to save five billion lives." I suppose, in a weird, twisted way, I have the invasion to thank for this. Because I never would have found Melanie if we weren't on the run from aliens._

_"That's wrong."_

_"Very wrong but very true." Didn't my father always say how irrational love was? How much you suddenly valued someone else more than yourself? How you'd be willing to follow that person everywhere?_

_That's Melanie to me. I love her._

_"Jared." She murmurs my name. She loves me too. How incredible this is._

_I stop myself before I can get too carried away. Even though we know now, how we feel about each other, I can't do this to her. "But…"_

_"But?"_

_"But you're seventeen, Melanie. And I'm twenty-six."_

_"What's that got to do with anything?"_

_I pull away from her slightly, still stroking her arms. I don't want to push her away fully. But my father did pound this one thing into my head._

_Comprehension dawns on her face. "You've got to be kidding me. You're going to worry about _conventions_ when we're past the end of the world?"_

_Yes. Despite her strength and resilience, she's still a girl. Young. Impulsive. I don't know if what she feels for me is as…deep. I don't want her to give herself to me just to regret it later. Most people don't fall in love in a month. And even then they really shouldn't tie the knot right then and there. So to speak—we can't get _married_ anymore._

_"Most conventions exist for a reason, Mel. I would feel like a bad person, like I was taking advantage. You're very young."_

_"No one's young anymore. Anyone who's survived this long is ancient."_

_I allow myself a smile. "Maybe you're right. But…" But I'm not budging on this either. "…this isn't something we need to rush."_

_"What is there to wait for?"_

_I cast my mind around, searching for a legitimate excuse. I need to wait until she's actually a woman, but I don't think she'd like that reasoning. "Well…for one thing, there are…practical matters to consider."_

_She looks at me questioningly. Skeptically. Distractingly._

_"See…when I was stocking this place, I wasn't much planning for guests." This is coming out wrong. "What I mean is…birth control was pretty much the last thing on my mind."_

_I suddenly imagine it, what unrestrained love could bring, and my face darkens. "This isn't the kind of world I'd want to bring a child into."_

_My words hit home. I know she's thinking of the child in the other room and how fearful his life will be._

_"Besides, we've got plenty of time to…to think about this. Do you realize how very, very little time we've been together so far? It's been just four weeks since we found each other."_

_She looks shocked. "That can't be."_

_"Twenty-nine days. I'm counting." As she ponders this, I repeat, "We've got time."_

_"You don't know that. You can't know how much time we'll have. You don't know if we should be counting in months or days or hours."_

_I kiss her forehead, reassuring her. "Don't worry, Mel. Miracles don't work that way. I'll never lose you. I'll never let you get away from me."_

I got three years, five months, and six days. Then I had to let her go.

"Hey, man." Brandt nudged me, breaking me out of my reverie. "It's been half an hour."

With great effort, I pulled myself back to reality. To who I was now. Jared Howe. Human fugitive. Raid leader. Single.

"Let's hit it." The house we'd been scoping out, that had stood darkened for thirty minutes now. We'd sat behind a blind of trees, watching for any other parasites to stray out to this isolated house.

"What do we need?" Aaron asked, checking his camouflage in my mirror.

Kyle, in the back with the supplies, answered, his voice muffled: "Rice, we've barely got any here. And I want some candy."

"Somebody throw something at him," I mumbled.

"Gladly." I heard Andy oblige me.

"You guys know what we're after. Be _quiet_ about it."

They all nodded. We were here for something other than food.

"Okay, who's staying?"

"I will," Andy offered.

"Let's go. Brandt, Aaron, you're together. Kyle, stick with me."

The four of us ducked out of the moving van and filed toward the unlocked, deserted house. Andy remained in the back of the van, opening the cargo doors to help us load when we came out.

We were somewhere in Texas. On our last leg of the raid.

This trip hadn't been any different from the others. The guys had cooperated with me fine, but were always watching me—Kyle especially—for some preoccupation, some irregularity. But I was focused like always.

I was okay. I really was.

The drama of the last week in the caves was really, truly behind me. It had been five weeks, and I had hardened myself. Iced over.

I entered the house first, easing the unlocked front door open. Noticing at once the hardwood floor, I motioned for everyone to remove their shoes. We had to be absolutely quiet.

We crept through the silent house, right past the kitchen. Up the stairs. Down the hall to the master bedroom.

The door was slightly ajar, the room containing a sleeping middle-aged couple. Parasites.

I held my hand out behind me, and Kyle passed me a bottle and a cloth. Slowly, so as to not slosh the liquid inside, I filled the rag with chloroform and passed the bottle back to Brandt so he could do the same.

We tiptoed into the room, pairing up on either side of the bed. Brandt and Aaron were on the man's side; Kyle and I had the woman.

It was very quick. They didn't wake up.

We carried them out of the bedroom, down the stairs, and out of the house where Andy waited to help us. This was the only part of the raid I flat-out hated. The first time I'd gone with them, when I discovered their kidnapping routine, I was shocked. Sickened. It had almost come a fight when I had objected. But they convinced me that one day it would help.

I studied the woman's still face, wondering if Doc would succeed with her. Could he figure out the secret? Would I ever see this woman alive and herself, not a parasite?

Could that have happened with Melanie?

I shoved that thought away as we loaded the centipedes in our van, tying them up in case they awoke. Of course not. Doc's efforts were doomed; they disgusted me. And even if he could get the parasite out and leave the human unscathed, the human conscience was long dead anyway.

I had just started to get over this. I didn't need to start questioning _now_ if I'd made the right choice. I knew I had.

My dreams of Melanie had continued, even into my waking hours. Somehow, though, they weren't as painful as before. I was coming to appreciate the period I'd had with her. Accepting the limited time.

Maybe, before Mel had come back as a parasite, I'd been moping around, waiting, hoping that she would come back to me. Really her. Now that I'd seen that wasn't possible…

Maybe my experience with the parasite would be good for me in the long run.

Maybe.

But I was getting over it, at least. Andy stayed again to guard our captives while we went back inside for provisions. As I searched the now-empty house for supplies, food, treats even, since we were almost done, I felt normal. Not angry or confused.

Some houses we broke into, normally the instances when we hit several houses in one neighborhood, we took nonperishable goods in small quantities. A single bag of potato chips. A few canned vegetables. A jar of peanut butter. Small booty that parasites could easily write off as misplaced or forgotten. Not the work of rogue humans.

Other houses, ones from which we'd ascertained the parasites were taking an extended absence, we emptied. If the parasites weren't returning for several days, we would have longer to get away, longer to stay in the clear.

Having robbed this house of its inhabitants, we could freely take whatever else we needed. With the owners in our possession, it would take other parasites even longer to connect this event with humans, longer for Seekers to get involved. We looted the house. Completely cleaned out the pantry and the fridge. Filled our ice chests with meat, eggs, and even some brandy that had been stowed in the back of the cupboard. Looked for penicillin or any human medicine, in the bathroom cabinets, to no avail.

We loaded the van completely, stuffing the back so full that there was barely any room for the guys. Kyle, the biggest, sat up front with me, but the others were uncomfortable, shoving each other and complaining loudly. They were pressed up against each other, and our hostages, whom we never let wake up.

The drive took four days. We ate as little as possible, trying to save as much food as possible for everyone in the caves. Kyle had claimed a bag of caramel sweets from the last house; he barely needed to eat anything else.

As we neared our home, everyone grew quieter. No one talked about what we'd find when we returned. Life would be normal. As it was every other time we came back.

There was no question that Mel's parasite, the centipede we'd left behind, was dead by now. I wouldn't ask who'd done it, or when, or how. It was done.

I drove the van straight to the caves so we could unload. I pulled up to the main entrance, not the low crawl space to the southern tunnel. Nobody questioned this.

When we entered the caves, carrying some of our spoils, the storage corridor was empty. There was no sign that anyone had been down here for weeks. I hated the way that made my heart hurt.

"Dang, this thing's _tiny!_" Andy remarked, folding himself into the storage hole. "Reminds me of hiding in the dryer as a kid."

I laughed with everyone else at this. Andy was good at that. Making a light joke that could have easily become awkward.

"Not that it matters now, but I wonder how _it_ managed it for a whole week."

Kyle. The master of insensitivity.

I dropped my big box of chips and cookies and walked down the dark tunnel without looking at anyone.

I went to find Doc.

He was in the infirmary. He winced when I told him what we'd brought, but of course he wanted to try them. Like he'd wanted to try Melanie.

On our way back, we met Jeb. He welcomed us back cordially, but there was a reservation in his eyes I couldn't understand. He didn't say anything about the parasite's fate, and I was glad.

The guys had finished the unloading by the time I got back with Jeb and Doc. We'd take our prisoners out of the van and take the van back to our "garage" tomorrow. All of us were exhausted.

As we carried the two unconscious parasites through the caves back toward the southern tunnel, I noticed that everyone had disappeared. There had been a few people milling around—I'd discreetly slipped past them—but now the caves were completely desolate. This was unusual for the early evening.

I heard voices coming from the kitchen, meaning that they were cooking, but that didn't take _everyone._ Where were they?

Dumping the bodies on Doc's cots, I quickly left the infirmary. I didn't want to stick around to watch him try, and fail.

I wiped my dirty face on my sleeve. The other guys, having followed me, pounded me on the back, congratulating me on another successful mission. We were in the main plaza by now, and Kyle exclaimed how much he wanted a bath.

A higher shout echoed through the huge cavern. Jamie came hurtling from the kitchen, a smile on his face.

"Jared! You're back, you're back!"

Thrown by his excitement—I hadn't seen him that happy since...well, a long time—I caught him in my arms, dirtying his t-shirt. He didn't seem to care; he kept talking animatedly. "You have to come to the kitchen, we've got chocolate bars! Oh gosh, it's the awesomest thing, and you're here now…how'd it go? We missed you!"

"I missed you too," I murmured bemusedly. He took my arm, pulling me toward the kitchen. The rest of the guys, energized by the prospect of chocolate bars, followed.

I heard the gruff voice behind me. "Jamie." I hadn't realized Jeb had followed too. "You'll want to be careful…"

"No, really, you'll wanna see!"

See what?

As we neared the kitchen, I heard voices. Not really voices, but one voice. One voice…that was achingly familiar.

Jamie dragged me around the corner, into the dining hall. Everyone was there. Facing the cooking area. Everyone.

Including the parasite I'd left for dead.

Melanie was standing behind the counter, helping Trudy put freshly baked bread into containers. She was talking, babbling something about…grandparents? Nine grandparents.

Not Melanie.

Jeb had let the parasite live. Not just live, but assimilate into the society. And not just Jeb. Ian was sitting comfortably near the oven, casually listening to the parasite speak. Wes was sitting in the crowd. Geoffrey and Heath. Lily. Travis. Walter. Reid and Violetta. Everyone.

They had all been suckered.

Hearing our entrance, the humans in the parasite's audience—they were listening to it talk, lie—turned with a collective gasp. The parasite kept talking for a moment, until it saw us too. It trailed off, catching sight of us—of me. It stared at me like it had the first time I'd seen it, its face expressing several emotions. Surprise, shock…joy, for some reason.

"What is the meaning of this, Jeb?" I asked, trying hard to keep my voice calm. I wanted to growl, to shout.

"Wanda is teaching us all about the universe," Jamie gushed. Still exuberant. Happy.

Because of the parasite. They'd let it into their lives. Jamie had let it into his _heart._ Just like I'd feared.

They'd even _named_ it.

_"Wanda?"_

Paige stood up from the crowd, stumbling toward us. "Andy!" She hurtled into her lover's arms, practically in tears. He held her tenderly, his attention diverted from the centipede who had wormed its way into the community's affections.

The community in question got up slowly, following Paige's lead, coming toward us to welcome us home. They glanced furtively back at the parasite. Guiltily.

Ian stayed beside it. Murmured something to it I couldn't hear. Reassurance?

"What the _heck,_ people?"

Kyle, standing behind me, had just now fully grasped the scene in front of us. Melanie's body. Alive. With everyone. Having duped them all. Kyle elbowed his way forward, straight for Melanie's body. "You're letting it tell you its lies? Have you all gone crazy? Or did it lead the Seekers here? Are you all parasites now?"

I hadn't thought of that. I hadn't checked anyone eyes, had only used my flashlight to confirm my own humanity. Had everyone been caught, implanted? Kept here to ensnare us when we returned? I released the boy still clinging to my arm, searching his face, his eyes, for any irregularity. Was this why he was so attached to Melanie's body now?

The people in the room looked guilty. Now they averted their eyes from Melanie's body as Kyle walked toward it. Except a few. I noticed that not everyone seemed ashamed. Trudy, Wes, Walter. They glared defiantly at us, returning our accusing stares. Were they as gullible as Jamie? Or were they...dangerous now?

Ian hopped off the counter quickly, walking forward. Stopping between Kyle and the parasite. Defending an alien against his flesh and blood.

"Things changed while you were gone, brother."

Kyle halted. I could see his silhouette tense with fear and shock. "Did the Seekers come, then, Ian?"

His younger brother stood firm. "She's not a danger to us."

Kyle pulled his flashlight out of his pocket, shone it in Ian's eyes. No silver reflection beamed back. "So, what, then? You're not a parasite. How did it get to you?"

I couldn't see any silver in Jamie's eyes either. He was human, just like before.

But he had become enamored of this parasite. Been taken in. Suckered.

Jeb had let it happen. Encouraged it, probably.

I could allow the parasite to die. I'd made my peace with that weeks ago. I could have even let Jeb allow it to live. Let him keep it prisoner a while longer.

But no. He'd _let_ Jamie become close to it. Let the kid get attached, knowing that one day the parasite would seize the opportunity to betray us all. Breaking Jamie's heart in the process. The parasite didn't care for the kid; Jamie was an instrument in its infiltration. The kid was a tool, and Jeb was letting him be used.

That was crossing the line.

Ian was talking quietly, trying to reason with Kyle. _Calm down,_ he was saying. I appreciated his diplomacy, but this was not the right situation. He was on the wrong side.

"No," I spoke up. Like that first day. Only now I was objecting to keeping the parasite alive. A reversal.

I'd thought earlier that I couldn't kill Melanie. Couldn't end her body's life because of the pain it would cause me.

But it wasn't just about me. That thing would end up hurting Jamie. Now it was time for me to put my personal feelings aside and do what was best for the kid. Be practical.

"I don't think anyone needs to calm down." I walked toward the parasite myself now. I had to end this before it got out of control. "Jeb…give me the gun." I'd make the kid leave. He wouldn't have to watch.

"Don't happen to have it on me," Jeb said behind me. I spun around, my eyes searching his body for his trademark weapon. Sure enough, he wasn't carrying it.

He wasn't carrying the gun around. Not to protect the parasite, nor to keep it under control. He just…let it run free.

But it had to die now. If Jeb wouldn't give me the gun, I could do it another way. Ian's way. "Fine. It will be slower this way." I'd have to look into its eyes as it died. "It would be more humane if you were to find that gun fast."

"Please, Jared, let's talk," Ian pleaded. So protective of it. What had it done to him? Not only did he feel guilty for almost killing it, now he was ready to guard it. Risk his life against us. His fellow humans. His _brother,_ even.

"There's been too much talk. Jeb left this on me, and I've made my decision." This had gotten way out of hand. It wasn't my feelings in danger from the parasite. It was all of us.

Jeb cleared his throat. Conspicuously. Trying to get my attention.

"What? You made the rule, Jeb." If he went back on this now, he was truly a traitor. He couldn't break his own rules. He had probably made that rule just when it looked like I'd keep the parasite alive. Now that I wouldn't, what would he do?

"Well, now that's true," he said. Good.

"Ian, _get out of my way._"

"Well, well, hold on a sec," Jeb broke in. "If you recall, the rule was that whoever the body belonged to got to make the decision."

Was he questioning my right to Melanie's body? I clenched my teeth together. I wasn't going to go there. "And?"

"Seems there's someone here with a claim just as strong as yours. Maybe stronger."

Who? Him? That wasn't fair. Surely he wouldn't put this decision on himself. But the only other person with lasting connections to Mel was…was…

Jamie.

Jeb had lost it.

Jamie understood. He had finally stopped smiling. It had finally dawned on him, what I was going to do. "You can't, Jared!" he cried, taking my arm again. "You wouldn't. Wanda's good. She's my friend!"

No. No, that thing was not his friend. He was too young and naïve to see it. All he saw was a kind, innocent façade from his sister's body.

"And Mel! What about Mel? You can't kill Mel! Please!"

And he still saw Melanie. As he struggled not to cry, as he pleaded for this alien's life, his judgment was still clouded by who this body used to be.

"So you can see Jamie's not in agreement. I figure he's got as much say as you."

Well, that he did—but he was not mature, not rational enough to see the right choice.

I didn't blame him. It had taken me weeks and some pretty extreme situations to reach this conclusion. It wasn't the kid's fault for not wanting this.

I blamed Jeb.

He'd let Jamie…fall in _love_ with this monster. Let him forget that that thing had killed his sister, that it had taken the entire planet from us, that it was now looking to get us captured and erased.

"How could you let this happen, Jeb?" I whispered. This was horrific. I'd lost the kid. Yes, he was still here, but he'd _given_ himself to the invaders. His love was tantamount to surrender.

Why hadn't I taken him with me? Why hadn't I been more responsible? Why couldn't _Jeb_ have been more responsible?

Jeb didn't answer me. "There is a need for some talk. Why don't you take a breather first, though? Maybe you'll feel more up to conversation after a bath."

I glared at him, my pain evident on my face. There was no way this situation would be rectified by talking. He stared back at me calmly, no panic or remorse in his eyes. The crazy old man really was trying to destroy me.

Finally, I gave up. I broke Jamie's hold on my arm and turned to leave. Kyle was still facing off with his brother. I made my voice a command. "Kyle."

He spun around and stomped out of the room with me. Andy led Paige out, and Brandt and Aaron followed. None of us said a word. We were in shock.

After several hundred feet in silence, Andy murmured to Paige, "What were you _thinking?_"

Paige's answer was a mortified whisper. "I…I don't know. She _seemed_ nice."

Kyle interrupted the couple's quiet conversation. "_She_ is not _human,_ sweetheart," he said nastily. "It is a _parasite,_ and it wants to kill all of us."

Delicate Paige shrank back from his vicious tone, and Andy glared at the big man. "Watch it."

"She was just telling us about other planets," Paige said meekly. But defensively. She really didn't see a problem with what she'd been doing. "She doesn't want to leave; she likes it here."

"It's not going to happen again," I said to all of them. "We have to take care of this tonight." I was sure of this now. It was best for everyone. Especially Jamie. He needed closure.

"Glad to see you come around," Kyle growled. "Now that my brother's gone to the dark side."

I pondered Ian's change of heart. What had it done to him, to make him believe? He'd already seemed to believe its performance the night we'd questioned it. Apparently in our absence, he'd become very…accustomed to it. Very familiar with it.

Urgh.

"Whaddya say to a bath?" I asked the guys. They grunted and nodded their assent, except Andy.

"I'll wait at bit," he said, his eyes on Paige again. He wanted to stay with his partner.

Naturally.

We split up, went to our rooms to get clean clothes. Made our way to the river room. Bathed in the pitch-black silence.

When we were all clean, I decided to go find Jamie. I needed to explain to him, once and for all. He needed to understand. I'd break it to him gently. I'd stay calm. But he had to accept Mel's death.

"What do we do?" Brandt asked me. I realized they were all waiting for my command. Because we were going to take the parasite out.

I thought a minute. If Jamie was as attached to the parasite as he'd seemed, he would be with it now. If I could find him…I could take care of the whole problem myself. And I didn't really want Kyle along.

"Just…go on and do something else. Help Doc, go to bed, whatever," I told them. "I'll take care of it."

"Good luck," Kyle muttered to me. And they filed out.

First I returned to my room. Grabbed a flashlight. Jamie wasn't there, even though it was probably about time for bed.

I returned to the kitchen, but only Heidi was there now. When I asked her if she'd seen Jamie, she shook her head.

I searched the big garden, the east field, even peeked in the game room. I didn't venture down the southern tunnel to Doc's. He probably wasn't finished with his victims, and I didn't care to watch _that_ tonight. Not now.

Where was Jamie?

I was on my way back to our room to wait for him to turn in—who knew _where_ the parasite slept?—when I met Reid on his way to his and Violetta's sleeping space. He told me he'd seen Jamie slip into the storage corridor.

There was only one reason Jamie would go down there.

My anger with the parasite returned in full force as I stormed back that way. I'd been so scared for Jamie that I'd almost forgotten why. I _hated_ that thing!

Entering the black corridor, I switched on the flashlight. I made no noise with my shoes, but shone the flashlight back and forth across the tunnel in big wide sweeps.

"_Jamie!_ I know you're back here!"

"Go away!" His high voice trembled with anger.

I rounded the last corner, illuminating Jamie standing with the parasite next to our cache. The parasite in Mel's body blinked, squinting into the beam.

Its eyes sent brilliant reflections scattering around the cavern.

Jamie flinched, but remained where he was, standing slightly in front of the parasite, as if he was…protecting it.

This gesture infuriated me. "Get _away_ from it!"

"Shut up! You don't know her! Leave her alone!"

Of course I didn't know _her;_ Jamie didn't know _her_ either. He only knew what this deceitful worm _wanted_ him to know. It wanted him to think that it wasn't a Seeker, that it was no different than Melanie.

I knew better.

My rage propelled me forward, and I tore Jamie away from the parasite. "You're being an _idiot!_ Can't you see how it's using you?" I was shaking him, I was so furious. This was not at all how I'd wanted to tell him, but it seemed he wouldn't understand any other way.

Melanie's body was suddenly very close to me. The parasite had squeezed itself in between me and Jamie. Protecting _him._

"Leave Jamie alone," it said quietly. Though it tried to be firm, its voice wavered in fear. It wasn't being tough; I could tell that this thing could never be fierce. It was doing this for Jamie—to gain his affections. But its fear betrayed it.

I grabbed its arms and threw Mel's body away from me. It hit the wall and fell into a pile of boxes. I reached for Jamie, to force him away from this scene, but he was staring at me in horror.

"Coward! She wouldn't hurt you to save her own life! Why can't you leave her alone?"

Before I could answer him—I had plenty of reasons why I wouldn't leave _it_ alone—Jamie grabbed the flashlight and ran over to it. "Wanda? Are you okay, Wanda?"

I didn't know where they'd gotten the name, or why they'd chosen it, but the fact that he was calling it by a human name peaked my temper. "Stay _away_ from it!" Why couldn't he let Mel go?!

He was shaking his head, not at me, but at the parasite. Why? Its lips were moving. Was it telling him to fight me? Hurt me?

I grabbed the kid with both hands now, yanking him away from Melanie's body, knocking another pile of boxes on top of the parasite. It cried out in pain.

Good. While it was trapped, I could send Jamie away, then finish the job.

"Stop hurting her!" Jamie cried out. He twisted free of me, spun around.

And punched me in the face.

My hand flew to my nose as I gasped in pain. The kid's little fist _hurt._ Although my nose didn't seem to be broken, I could feel blood trickling down my face.

Jamie's angry, defensive glare slowly slid off his face. Now he looked like he was about to cry. "You aren't the man I thought you were."

He turned and walked back down the corridor, tears threatening to spill over.

The pain in my chest was worse than in my nose. Jamie hadn't felt sorry for hitting me. He'd done it because…I'd hurt him. The actions I'd taken to _protect_ him had broken his heart.

_I'd_ hurt him, not the parasite.

He was gone now, though. I could finish the parasite; it was still struggling out from under the heavy boxes. I could end it now.

But Jamie.

I knew Melanie's body would eventually try to betray us. But from what Jamie could see, for the time being, he'd been betrayed by me. Betrayed and disillusioned.

_You aren't the man I thought you were._

"Aw, _dang it!_" I shouted. "Jamie, get back here!" There was no response. I forced the next words from my mouth. "I'm sorry, okay? Don't cry, kid!" I didn't want to apologize for hurting it. The parasite deserved it.

But I had to fix this. Square things with the kid before I did anything that would hurt him more.

I stole a last look at Melanie's body. It was watching me, fear evident on its face. It was terrified of me. As I picked up the flashlight, I could see blood oozing from a scrape on her cheek. How had that happened? It hadn't been there a minute ago…

I turned around, forcing the question from my mind. "Jamie! Jamie, I'm sorry, you hear me? I'm _sorry!_" I jogged down the corridor, catching up to him at the mouth. "Hey, _please_ listen."

He didn't turn around, but kept walking, his steps jerky. "You hurt her. She loves you, and you _hurt_ her."

I was speechless for a moment. She _loved_ me? "Jamie, why would you say that? Okay, it's Mel's body, but she's not there! I feel bad about it too, kid. I understand. But…that thing wants to hurt us. Like your dad. Remember what happened to your dad?" His father had been caught—and had come back for him and Melanie with Seekers in tow.

He'd stopped walking. His lip trembled. "She's different," he finally whispered. "She told me…she told me…" He bit his lip and wiped his face fiercely.

So the parasite had been filling Jamie's head with harebrained lies, and he'd swallowed all of them. Believed in the love it had offered. Of course he'd be angry if I tried to hurt it.

I needed to hear all these lies. I needed to know everything it had told them, so I could figure out why. I needed to know exactly what everyone thought about this parasite.

I had to go talk to Jeb.

* * *

**Okay. From now on in the story, things are going to start picking up, so it won't all be gloom and doom and hate and whatnot. BUT...that also means that the story will get...harder to write. Ergo...longer periods between postings. Sorry in advance!**

**I'm telling you, this story is messing up my grammar. I keep referring to EVERYONE as _it. _I've even done it in real life a couple of times! Glad that'll change soon in the story.**

**Okay...apologies in advance for my bad Spanish: Gracias para leer KylerM. Couldn't resist!**


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